Borrowed Time

Chapter Ten

Honestly, the world might be a lot less cruel if it stopped letting Juliette wake up. Ever since she came out to Shelby and Micheal officially, she'd been dreaming of just... not waking up. Not dying, just staying in a quiet limbo in her room forever with no one checking on her and no one worrying... a room where she could just be fucking furious at herself for not being normal. God, why couldn't she have just been normal? She'd worked so hard for it. Juliette sighed, staring up at her ceiling... she had church today, that meant that unless she was sick, she had to go... and unfortunately, she felt perfectly healthy. A soft knock came on her door around 7:45. Why? Mass wasn't for another hour.

"Juliette? Honey, we have to leave for church." Her dad said, his voice muffled by the door. Juliette shook her head, turning toward her wall. She didn't want to talk to him, it was easier to make sure that he was already upset with her if she was going to become something he'd be ashamed of.

"It's right next door, forgive me if I'm not rushing." She mumbled, and her father shut the door behind him. Alright, so apparently her apathetic attitude meant that he could come in and sit on the edge of her bed like he used to do when she was a kid... God, she couldn't even remember the last time they were like this.

"Is something wrong? Did something happen?" He asked, and she shrugged. A million things were happening to her recently, and somehow they all seemed to fly right over his head... and the one thing that was truly happening was something that she could not talk about with him right now, she didn't want to disappoint him before his sermon.

"No. I'm fine." She grumbled, and her dad sighed, leaning back to place a hand on her shoulder, which she shook off. She didn't want to be touched by him, she didn't want him to be tainted by her own sin, that wasn't fair to him.

"Jules... I haven't seen you this upset since your mom died... is something going on?" He asked, and Juliette shrugged. Yeah, there was something going on, but if he actually cared, he would've noticed a long time ago... Trying to keep herself apathetic was going to help, it'd hurt less when he decided that she was no longer his child.

"Nope. Not that you'd notice anyway." Juliette snapped, and her dad paused at this. Right, she didn't often take a tone with him... Because in order to take a tone with him, she'd have to actually see him enough to have a conversation with him.

"What does that mean?" He asked, and Juliette shrugged, squeezing her eyes shut. God, she wanted to cry... It meant a million things. It meant that he sat there and let Samantha treat her like shit, it meant he hadn't even noticed that his own child wasn't who he thought she was... It meant that she wanted him to love her more, but all he seemed to do was fade further away.

"You know what it means." She pulled her blanket over her head, curling into a ball under it. "Close the door on the way out." At first, she thought maybe he wouldn't, maybe he'd stay longer to figure out what was wrong... but the bed dipped when he stood back up.

"... Okay, kiddo. I'll see you later." He said, leaning down to press a kiss to the side of her head. He gently shut the door behind him and Juliette sighed, closing her eyes even as she felt like she was going to cry again... God, she hadn't been having much water, there was nothing left to cry, she was almost 100% sure of it. After about twenty minutes and another attempt to doze back off, Juliette's door swung open hard and she jumped. Shit, was that Samantha?

"Juliette, get the hell out of bed." Nope, just Shelby. Her heartbeat slowed down and her panicked breathing fell back into a normal rhythm as the blanket got yanked off her head. She glared up at Shelby, lips settling in a small frown as she tried to pull it back over, only to be stopped again by her. Asshole. Why couldn't she just lie here and wallow in her well earned self pity? It was just getting fun.