Careful What You Wish For...

T H I R T Y - S E V E N

Vivian's POV

I've spent the whole day with my mom, just hanging out at her house. I haven't been here in such a long time, it's odd. It's nearing night time, and Noah has barely spoken to me. He asked me if I made it okay, and I let him know I did. Aside from that, he hasn't held up any conversation with me.

I've tried to not let it bother me, so I can actually spend some quality time with mom. But I can't help but to think of everything that happened, and how he looked when he came home.

I've come to find out that Jason has moved in with mom. They've been living together for a couple of months now. "Whats wrong, honey?" My mom asks, as she finishes the last bit of food she was cooking. I guess I can't hide my emotions. "What? Nothing... I'm fine." I give her another fake smile, expecting her to buy it. "Vivian Jane. I know my daughter. What's wrong?" She sets down the spatula she had in her hand, turning to me once more.

I think it's time to tell her...

"Mom..." I choke back tears, and she immediately looks worried. "I had a baby but the baby didn't make it..." Sobs leave my chest, and mom makes her way over to me. "What? Oh honey! Why didn't you tell me!" She pulls me into a hug, holding me tightly as I cry. "I don't get-" my breath hitches between words "how it happened!" Mom rubs my head before pulling away.

"Baby, tell me everything." She looks into my eyes, and makes me sit down on the couch. This is something I'm upset about, but it's not what's on my mind right now. I just need to get something off my chest.

I tell her everything, including the name, and she's crying for me. "Oh, Vivian. I wish you would've told me and I would've came straight to you!" She wipes her eyes free of tears. "I know, mom. I had Noah and Nick with me. I just don't understand how it can just happen like that." I say. "I know, it's confusing. You might not remember this because you were really young. About 4 years old. But I had the same thing happen to me. I was 17 weeks, and I was having a normal day. Until I wasn't. Your dad dropped you off at Grandmas, and took me to the hospital. It was a very terrifying experience. Only thing different is that everyone knew. I think it's better that everyone didn't know with you." Mom gets up, starting to put dinner plates together.

"With everyone knowing, you have to sit and explain to everyone who asks. 'What happened' and 'Where's the baby'. You should definitely find someone to talk to Viv, keeping that in doesn't help either." I agree with my mom, and promise her I will find someone. Once Jason comes back home, we eat dinner and spend the rest of the night just relaxing.

...............

Being I came for a few days, my mom requested these days off. Today, were being as girly as possible, which includes getting our nails done, possibly doing something to our hair and shopping.

"Get what you want, I'll pay. Moms treat!" My mom hands over the little menu for the nail salon, and makes me choose. I don't like nails on my fingers all that much, so I chose to get a pedicure. I pick out my color, which ends up being a mint green color. It's not too standoutish, but its not bland either. I sit in the chair with my feet in the warm water, and stare at the tv in front of me.

Once my toes are done, I wait for my mom who is almost done with her fingernails. They finish up her nails, and we make our way over to the mall to look around.

"This is too much, Goodwill?" My mom asks me. I nod my head, being I love thrift stores. I'd prefer to not spend all my money anyways. After looking around for a while, I only buy a few things. All clothing items. We catch lunch before going back to the house, and I get a ping on my phone.

Noah- Attachment: Image

"Oh my God!" I speak out once I've swallowed my food. "What?" Mom asks. "Noah cut his hair! I haven't seen him with short hair in so long!" I turn around the phone, to show her the picture of Noah sitting in a salon chair with his hair short and slicked back. "So he does clean up nice?" My mom laughs, being she's never seen him with such short hair. "Have y'all talked about getting married?" Mom asks, taking another bite of her food. My heart sinks, considering the reason why I'm here. "Oh, no. We've just been living life together. Enjoying our time with each other."

At some point, I have to stop with the lies. However, I do hope Noah and I get married at some point. I know this is just a rough patch between us. Everybody has those. "That's good to hear though. I'm glad you both are happy. I better get to see my daughter walk down that isle though. Or I'll come after that boy!" Mom and I both laugh. We finish lunch, and head straight home. I decide to give Noah a call, being I haven't really talked to him since being here.

"Hello?"
"Hey! I haven't heard your voice in a minute. I figured I would call and talk for a minute. What made you cut your hair?"
"I just needed a change. It was getting to long."

Noah and I talk for a little longer, before saying "I love you" and hanging up. He seems more upbeat. I know he probably still hurts. I could tell he edited his photo before sending it to me. He knew I would probably show my mom. Jason comes home from work, and my mom disappears for a shower. "Hey, can I talk to you?" Jason appears from around the kitchen, into the living room. "Yeah, what's up?" I turn my attention towards him, and he speaks low. "I know we're adults, but I wanted to ask you either way because it is your mom. How would you feel if I asked your mother to marry me?" My heart jumps, with sadness and excitement.

"If you really love her, I think you should do it. Do you think she's ready for that?" I ask him. He chuckles lightly. "Well I hope so. I'm definitely ready. And being as you're an adult as well, I'm sure it is obvious that you dont need to call me 'dad'. I think that would be a little odd at this point." We both laugh, and agree. "Thank you so much Vivian, I just didn't want to upset you in any way. I care about your mother a lot, as well as you." We share a brief hug, and he disappears back into the kitchen.

I can't believe that my mom might be getting remarried! It's sad to think that she's moving on from dad, but as I've said before. She deserves to be happy.

After dinner, I just go straight to bed after a shower. I got tired real quick, out of literally no where. The moment I hit the pillow, I'm out.

I'm in the hospital? Why am I here? I look down, and notice my belly is huge... What? I'm pregnant? I'm having a baby? I feel immediate pain surrounding my whole lower body. Contractions... I look around the room, and I'm alone. I press the call button for help, and a nurse walks in. "Yes?" She asks. "Where's Noah? What's going on?" I ask. "Who's Noah? You're in labor. You're 8 centimeters dilated. Do you want me to get your husband?" The small framed nurse turns to leave the room, to grab Noah. A few minutes pass, and she walks in. Matt is behind her. "You okay baby? I was just talking to my mom about what's going on." What!? No... No... Something immediately feels off, and I get a huge contraction. I groan out in pain, and the nurse decides to check me. She calls out for the doctor, and he quickly walks in. "She's ready to push." I'm not having a baby... Not with him... I feel no pain with birth, but they dont immediately hand me the baby. "Where's the baby?" I ask, as doctors are scrambling around the room.

TRIGGER WARNING

They turn around, and hand me a baby, but it's very small and fragile. It's covered in blood. I gasp when I see the baby. I turn it to face me, and my heart drops. "What's wrong?" I ask, panic filling my voice. "Why can't I see his face?" I stroke the hair that sits on top of the baby's head. "I'm so sorry for your loss." The doctor says to Matt. The doctors and nurses leave the room, leaving just me, Matt, and this unreal baby. Matt has tears coming down his face. "This is your fucking fault! You killed my fucking baby!" Matt grabs me by the throat, choking me out. The baby falls to the floor. I struggle to breathe, as I watch Matt slowly take my life.

TRIGGER END

"Vivian!" I'm shaken awake. I open my eyes to the sight of my mom standing above me. Jason stands behind her. I breathe heavily, and look at my mom confused. "Are you okay?" Mom asks, holding onto my shoulders. "I-I... He killed me. My baby wasn't there... It was him!" I say, trying to hold back sobs. "What do you mean, baby? It's okay." Mom shushes me, and hugs me. I start to cry, and my mom asks Jason to make coffee while she sits in the spare bed with me. "Vivian, please go talk to someone. It will eat you alive if you dont. Promise me the moment you land, you'll make an appointment." I nod my head, and continue to sob while being held by my mom.

Once I've stopped crying, she pulls me into the kitchen for coffee. I look at the time on the stove, and notice that it's 5 in the morning. "I have to go in today. But I won't be there a full day. If you need absolutely anything, you know you can call me." Mom takes a sip of her coffee, before heading out to her bedroom to get dressed. I rub my eyes, exhausted from my nightmare. That wasn't sleep at all. That was terrorizing. I down my cup of coffee, and see mom and Jason off to work. I'm stuck in their house alone for a while.

I'm glad that wasn't real...