Same Bitches - Post Malone

41

When they get to the reception hall, Austin takes her hand and pulls her behind a building.

"What's going on?"

"Nothing."

"You forget I know you."

"But, you don't do you?"

"Luxie-"

"You know the girl from ten years ago. I am not that girl and I..." Lux starts but her words trail off. She hates this vulnerable feeling. It's shit.

"I, what, Luxie?"

"Nothing."

"Luxie..."

"I am scared! Ok? I am scared...fuck."

Austin frowns, she can see her words have taken the wind out of his sails. Her admission to being scared is vulnerable. Very vulnerable. Lux is not vulnerable. Austin places his hand on her chest and pushes her against the wall, holding her in place as if he is afraid she will run away. "What are you scared of, Lux?" he whispers, his face careful. Lux swallows thickly and looks away, watching the waves break on the shore, fear making the pits of her stomach swirl. If she tells Austin her fear, her real fear, she will have no cards left to play. She will be completely exposed. She feels Austin's finger brush under her jaw and she faces him again. His face grows worried when he sees tears pooling in her eyes.

"I am scared...I am scared of losing you...again. I don't know if I could do that for a second time."

Austin watches her for a moment, his eyes searching hers. "I am scared too. Because I still love you. I always have. It scares the living shit out of me...but it was ten years ago and I don't want to walk away. I want this. I want you," Austin says.

"Austin-"

"It will take work. A lot of work. I don't trust you...but, I don't want to let you go...not again," Austin says and Lux's mind races a million miles an hour.

"Austin, I never-"

"I know you never meant to hurt me. You say that all the time, can we move on from that sentence?" Austin says, almost snapping. It's not right. He says he wants this and that means he has technically forgiven her - but he can't stomach the idea of her cheating without anger coursing through his body. He is not over her apparent cheating. He won't even let her finish a sentence, how the fuck is she suppose to tell him she never cheated if he won't let her speak.

"Austin-" she starts again, but stops when the wedding hall erupts in cheers. "Shit, we need to get back," Austin says taking a step back and taking her hand.

"We are fine. We will talk it through and work everything out tomorrow, ok?"

"Ok," Lux whispers, but it does not feel ok.

The reception is nice...ish. She is going to need to talk to Demi about her obsession with pink...and cowboys. She had not been joking about the cowboys on the beach theme wedding. But, it is Demi's wedding and she looks so fucking happy so who gives a shit - she can do whatever she wants. Lux is happy too, she is hiding in a corner sipping the glasses of wine Louis keeps passing her. She is sure he is watering them down and has accused him twice so far - he has not denied it.

Eventually, though, everything has to come to an end and so she groans when she sees the bridesmaids start to clear the dance floor and call everyone's attention. Austin walks over to her and puts out his hand without a word and a look of warning. She won't get out of this dance, he will never let their shit ruin this wedding. Lux would have a bitchy comment but honestly - she just does not have it in her right now so she takes Austin's hand and lets him lead her onto the dance floor. Demi and Shawn, along with all the other guests are looking at them with confused faces. Lux has not had enough to drink for this shit show, but it's too late, and Hailey who is now too emotional to speak hands the mic to Lux.