leah williamsons younger sister a gunner through and through, fresh from the academy at age 16 the youngest on the senior team and by far one of the most popular, she is the baby of the team and loved by all of them they treat her like a sibling, pr...
The real reason is how do I explain to her, that I'm here cause I've been having panic attacks for over a month so I came here to get them to stop. I could say that but no. "Umm, good question, anxiety I guess," or that another way to do it. She looks shocked," I'm getting better being here though, but I might go back soon, miss ona now," I continue. "Ella, look after yourself please,"she sighs kissing me on the forehead and leaving the room. Well I'm alone again, nothing new I guess. "El, you ok, I've been here for about 10 minutes trying to get you attention," Beth says. "Sorry, yeh I'm good, I need to talk to Alessia properly now that I've chilled out a bit," I mumble trying to think about what to say. "Talk to her tomorrow, me, you, Viv and Leah are going to watch a film," she says tossing me some clothes. One of my button up shirts in pink, my white jeans which I still don't know why I own them, I mean I've literally never warn them, and my black leather jacket. "Fine, but tomorrow your not stopping me," I grumble going to get changed.
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Well, we are watching Barbie which is quite funny I can't lie it a good film, Leah and Viv posed for an photo earlier which was amusing for me.
@ ella8williamson
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Cheeky movie with @ LeahWilliamson @ Beth mead @ VivianneMiedema Great day💖💖
Well I did enjoy the film, but now all I can think about is Alessia, I'm going to talk to her now, I'm not waiting. Decision made, Beth can't stop me cause she's in a different room, just have to get away and take my bike cause it's to far to walk and I can't be bothered.
And I'm out, one problem solved, well until I get back and the wonder where I've been. Now what to say to her. You know what I know exactly what I want to say. *Knock Knock* As I stand here I can feel my anxiety rising but I'm not letting this happen now, I need to say what I want to say first. "Hey," she says opening her door. " hi, I'm sorry but we need to talk," I stutter. No not now, no this isn't going to happen,100, 97,94,91 ok, I'm good for now. "Umm yeh, come in and we can do that," she says her face softer than it was a few hours prior. " I want to text you,to remind you that I'm always here, but then you know I remember that in reality you just don't care. I've spent hours days even wanting your name to pop up to say you missed me but that never came, the worst part it if you called me at 2 am I would be here in a heartbeat, I would travel to the other side of the world to make sure you were ok, but I don't think no, I know you wouldn't do the same for me, you that is the worst part about loving someone who doesn't love you," I say finally weight being lifted off my chest. "You love me," she says shocked. "Don't sound so shocked Alessia, yes I love you, ok," I mumble. "That's nice," she says making my heart drop. "That's nice, I told you about my anxiety, I crashed my motorbike because of you, I love you," I say tears in my eyes." I say my voice breaking.
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Well I'm gonna take a little trip, already got my bike, I have my card in my phone case, and I have a bag so I can stop to get some food on my way. Everything is good, not like I just told someone I love them and well that's nice apparently. Why is my phone ringing, well kinda have to answer. Although I probably shouldn't whilst going 100mph on the M5 E: hola ??: hey, I'm sorry.
Well if I wrap my bike around a tree it's her fault.
E: fuck off Alessia A: please listen E: no, I hate you, I hate you for hurting me. And I hate you in ways I can't imagine, but mostly I hate myself......
Alessia's pov
She loves me and all I said was that's nice what is wrong with me, of Course I love her, I just can't say it to her, I'm calling her, I need to tell her. It rang once, I'm gonna try again. Yes she picked up
E: hola A: hey, I'm sorry. E: fuck off Alessia A: please listen E: no, I hate you, I hate you for hurting me. And I hate you in ways I can't imagine, but mostly I hate myself...... A:ella, ella, answer me, shit Ella.
No, no, no, what happened, where is she. I need to call Leah. A: Leah, do you know where Ella is L: no haven't seen her since we got back I thought she was upstairs, sorry getting another call got to go.
Leah's pov
Well upstairs is quite maybe she's just tired, fuck sake why is she calling.
A: Leah, do you know where Ella is L: no haven't seen her since we got back I thought she was upstairs, sorry getting another call got to go.
L: hello, who is this ?: hey this is Southampton hospital, we have a Ella Williamson here who has just been brought in with some injuries, is this Leah Williamson. L: yes, she's my sister what kind of injuries, and how. SH: she sustained a head injury and some critical injuries that we haven't identified as of yet on the M5 her motorcycle is not going to be in use again, we recommend coming down here and we need to contact her other emergency contact. L: ok thank you for letting me know.
Shit, shit, shit. What did she do. No, I don't have panic attacks what the fuck. "Leah, what going on," Viv says "Umm, Ella she...." I say it becoming harder to breathe. "Ella's what,"Viv says resting her hand on my shoulder. "She's in hospital,in Southampton."
