ST Helmet Break
When I was three maybe four years old my family, mostly my father, really enjoyed the movie "Football Boy" which was about a water boy for a football team. Thing is the basis of the movie if you haven't seen it, is about visualization to control your emotions, but this was a movie about tackling and football. The water boy would use his mind to generate anger and then with head first tackle the opposing team member with extreme force.
After seeing this movie several times, I being four years old wanted to imitate the actor so what I did I regret very much so to this day. My family had a football helmet from the Ohio ST College team which was regulation and a very tough helmet. One day after watching the movie I went into my room to get the helmet so I could be part of the movie experience.
When my father was in the living room and I was across from him I foolishly tried to imitate the football tackler, and so put my head down and ran full force at my father. I can't remember why but my father wasn't standing up so his head was at my height and man this hurts, but I ran into his head with the helmet so hard that the helmet cracked.
After the impact my father laid down flat on the floor with his eyes closed by in a daze. This likely caused not only a concussion, but who knows the long lasting impact on my father from this one incident. I really wish my parents had talked to me about pain and hurting others when I was a child, instead they raised us all to hate and hurt each other.
My father never went to the hospital, he just laid on the living room floor for at least 20 minutes. I remember my brother commenting on how the impact was so hard it cracked the helmet, but I don't remember my mother or older brother attempting to help my father and they should have taken him to the hospital to get checked out. I think this was again when we had no money, so either out of free choice or being constrained by not having the money, my father never saw a doctor for an assessment or treatment. When I reflect upon this incident I question that if my father's behavior later in life was the result of this impact. It very easily could have caused a brain injury or worse, but no money means no medical care.
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Searching for the Answer
Non-FictionThis is a compilation of stories involving childhood abuse and trauma through a first-person impactful perspective mostly chronological. It is my story and is not fabricated in any way. I am posting just to get feedback thank you.
