LSD
In 2015 I delved into psychedelics for the first time, I was 22 years old. When I lived at Heartland I was introduced to a somewhat large dealer through my roommate. In terms of the chain of command, he was the one that supplied ounces, one step above your everyday dealer. Aside from supplying lower level dealers he also sold mushrooms, LSD, and Molly. I never tried his Molly even though every time I went to buy from him he suggested it. There is the saying, "the highest highs have the lowest lows," which is why I stuck to psychedelics. I did buy an ounce of mushrooms in late January to split between my friends as well as a couple tabs of the LSD synthetic, but I'll tell you those stories a little later.
After getting to know him and had bought mushrooms and LSD from him I started buying $20 sacks of weed from him which was something in the range of 1.4 grams of decent quality. I bought fairly regularly, I don't know why he sold them to me given he sells ounces sometimes pounds, it wouldn't be worth his time, but he did. I tried to project myself as a nerdy white kid that just liked smoking weed. Every time I went over to his house I complemented it, he was a good guy. One time when I went to his new house after he had moved I walked in and he had thousands of dollars on his table and a shotgun behind him. I comment "is that a shotgun?" he replied "yup", and I replied "dope".
Anyways going back to psychedelics. The reason I wanted to try LSD initially was that I wanted to see if my outlook could change and I went off the advice of a friend of mine from high school that had done it himself. The first time I bought two tabs and instead of LSD it was the synthetic. I know this because LSD has no taste, while the synthetic makes your tongue numb.
Whenever I tried the tabs it was already 11:00pm and I had just got off work. I knew it would be better to save them for the morning where I could admire the daylight, grass, trees, etc.., but I didn't, it was too enticing to take the tabs then and there.
I waited for the tabs to kick in and I had already prepared myself with a notepad and pen to write down any potential revelations. I spent the night passively reflecting on my life as I wrote down the thoughts as they would appear. I believe the central message was "don't be so hard on yourself."
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Searching for the Answer
Non-FictionThis is a compilation of stories involving childhood abuse and trauma through a first-person impactful perspective mostly chronological. It is my story and is not fabricated in any way. I am posting just to get feedback thank you.
