Arrangement without return (Reader x Black hat)

56. I feel...

I did not who else I can talk to. The only one available was Flug. Demencia was out of order as my conversation would be around my husband and she would love every single detail to her own amusement. Sadly, I was not happy with the situation.

And neither was Flug the minute he had seen my face at his doorstep. There he was in his stripped pajama rubbing his eye tired, "What do you want Y/N?"

"I am in deep trouble."

He yawned loud before stretching his arms "More than you ever know."

"This is serious Flug. He wants to sleep with me..." I looked away embarrassed, "...all my distractions don't work anymore."

"I am surprised that he plays along with your games. Normally my Lord has no patience for anything."

We both sat on Flug bed as we kept on talking about the situation. In his eyes I must face it and give in to black hats wish. On the other hand, if I keep on pushing him off it might get worse for my own sake. I shuddered under the thought of the worst-case scenario. Flug patted my back smiling lightly, "I do not think Black hat is the type to force a woman to sleep with him. You will not survive this night."
"This is black mail!"

Flug rubbed his arm I just punched. The audacity that the doc thinks that this is my free choice. His eyes softened, "I known my lord for a long time and from what I know...he won't force you tonight or any other night."

"Yeah, how would you know? Either this or death...your words."

Flug shook his head no trying to explain this 'death 'situation in another perspective. Killing me will not do Black hat any favors but to psychologically kill me from the inside is more Flug was referring to. He wants to break me mentally.

"So far he didn't do a good job at it."

The doc shook his head once more, "You already have, and he knows it."

"Flug you are hiding something from me. What is it?"

He wasn't allowed to say. His fear to not see me again if far worse for Flug as to keep his mouth shut and hurt my feelings in the process, "I don't know anything...and let's keep it that way." Flug pushed me out the door and closed it with me outside. With my head hanging low I dragged myself to the bedroom. Through the corridor I thought of Flug's words hoping for some kind of clue not to get near my husband. Unaware that something was watching me the whole time.

The minute I reached the doors I heard the creepy giggles from above. Knowing the sound all to well, "Demencia what are you up to?"

Looking up I faced a small camera while Dmeencia was hanging from the ceiling, "It is your first true night with my Lord...I want this moment to last...forever~"

"You sicko...stay out!"

With enough force I slammed the door shut, Demencia flew back by the impact while whining outside to get in. I assumed she could get a way inside, but the door and all the windows coated with a dark shadow keeping everyone out. Just me and black hat alone.

"What kept you?" he asked me while looking up from his book.

I went to the closet to get changed, "I needed someone to talk to."

"You got me, right here."

"This is not the same" I said now in my pajama and at the edge of the bed. His eye followed me till the bedsheets covered my body. He didn't move or even tries to get anywhere near me. But his stare remained, "Something is on your mind, and you refuse to tell me."

Smart, I thought. But in fear he finds my thoughts ridiculous as always, I stayed silent. He closed the book and placed it on the bed night table, "Do distractions for tonight?"

"Isn't eavesdropping on conversations not entertaining enough?" I was certain he listened to my talk with Flug. He nodded, not denying it in the lightest, "I don't want a wife that destroys herself to get away..."

No way, I thought not expecting him to be like Flug described him.

"...that is my job."

Flug, you do not know him at all!

"So, you are going to break me mentally...fine...bring it on!" scared of what might happen next, I sat up looking right at his face. His smile faded looking disappointed, "You don't get it. Still pathetic to understand anything."
"Enlighten me why don't you."

"You won't understand even if it lies before you."

Frustrated and irritated I punished him while leaving my hand at his chest, "I don't know what you really want from me! I hate this game; I hate to be your wife!"

His face got closer, kissing me lightly. It was quick an innocent. He backed off with a wicked grin, "You soon find out. Because I love this game and to be your husband. Night dearest." He turned around and left me there dumbstruck.

"I thought you wanted to..."
"I am not in the mood."

I asked him about the dinner earlier only for him to grumble that I just ruined his mood for him. My guess is my frustrated whining I just presented killed the moment. I should be proud of myself, I got away again. But this was not the case. I felt...confused.

Watching his back I did not know what to think of him. One minute he gets all romantic the next all evil and mischievous and lastly mean and disappointed. I held out my hand towards black hats back, rubbing it lightly. He did not move, just a small growl was heard. Withdrawing my hand I jumped at his words.

"Why did you stop?"

I hesitated before rubbing his back again gaining the growl again. I assumed it was bad, but this sound was his sign of comfort. My heart skipped a beat as I felt something I should not feel for him at all...

...no...

...do not...