𝑻 𝑯 𝑬 𝑵 𝑨 𝑵 𝑵 𝒀 (18+)

sixty-two

                                 D O M I N I C

"Any last words before you go in?" David rested a hand on my shoulder and it took everything in me not to smack it off. "Don't say it like that baby," Tiffany scolded him. I knew what he meant but that didn't make the fact that he said it any less annoying.

"Dom knows what I meant. I'm just saying, anything you want to get off your chest before you go inside?" He persisted and I sighed to myself. Amara had class so she couldn't be in attendance with the rest of my family and even though they couldn't join me inside of the courtroom their support out here was enough. She wished me good luck this morning and followed it up with a 'not that you'd need it.' While I had faith that I'd be leaving this courtroom with full custody of my kids that didn't make the future look any less grim.

"I guess I'd just like to say thank you for all the help and support you all have given me over the years. I know that things have been a bit rocky recently but I wouldn't have been able to get those kids to where they are right now without you." Taking a deep breath I stood from the bench and clapped my hands together, "so whatever happens today just know that I'm grateful and I love you."

I didn't like being too emotional, especially in public but I felt this moment called for it. Over the past few months I'd been taking some serious stock over my life and what is important to me and my future. My kid's future. This day didn't only mark a change for them it would be a change for me as well and I'd welcome it with open arms. It might not have been instant and it certainly wouldn't happen tomorrow but I would do everything I could to make this second chance right.

Not only with myself but with my kids.

I looked at the clock on the wall and sighed to myself, "It's time. I'll see you all when this is finally over." I didn't bother looking at them before I left for the courtroom. I knew what I'd see when I looked at their faces and I didn't want pity nor did I need it.

"Ready to do this Dom?" My lawyer nudged me in the arm as he sat down next to me. I could see Stephanie from the corner of my eye shifting in her seat. I didn't want to look at her, I shouldn't have looked at her but everything in me was telling me to do so. Once I did, her eyes met mine and she smiled half-heartedly. She looked bad, dark circles under her eyes and her hair wasn't as neat as it usually was. She was dressed for court but not in anything she'd usually wear and when the eye contact got to be too much she looked at her shoes instead of challenging me.

I'd said it a million times and I'd say it a million more but I still couldn't wrap my head around how we ended up here. Not only at odds with ourselves and one another but with our children. When I looked at Stephanie I was reminded how quickly love could turn into something sour. How more often than not, love was not enough to keep a relationship going and God did I love her. With everything in me, I wanted her to be the last woman I'd ever touch.

Now I couldn't imagine ever touching her again.

It was Amara who I wanted to come home to when all of this was over and though she made her decision—one that I respected—I didn't like it. I wanted her to move in with me, wanted to spend every morning for the foreseeable future with her by my side. I wanted to plan with her, to grow with her, and by the grace of God get down on one knee and promise to spend the rest of my life loving her.

It was fucking crazy, I knew that but a second chance at life didn't just come to everyone. I wouldn't waste mine second-guessing every decision I made.

"As ready as I'll ever be," I laughed. My lawyer looked at me and smiled, "This judge is as straight as they come. We'll just present our evidence, that alone will work in our favor."