JAXTON BEAU SANDOVAL
"I think... I want to break up with you."
I raised a brow, looking at Elisse, my girlfriend... now ex-girlfriend as my forehead creased.
"All of a sudden?" I asked. We've been dating for almost a year already. Wala naman kami naging problema maliban nalang sa mga ibang lalaking lumalapit sa kanya.
She nodded. "No offense, but it's kind of nakakasakal. Look, I know how much you care and love for me, but... hindi naman pwedeng ikaw lang ang kakausapin ko palagi. My world doesn't revolve around you only..."
Nakakasakal... so I'm like that huh? My first relationship is tainted with the image of my over-bearing possessiveness and jealousy.
"Okay, if that's what you want. I respect that, Isse." I told her. It wasn't like we were anything serious. I was also feeling the cold shoulder, and I guess it didn't really bothered me that much to care.
Tumayo siya at ngumiti sa akin.
"I hope we can still be friends, though." she tapped my shoulder and went ahead.
In the field of relationships, I always somehow make a mess out of it. Ako ang laging may mali. Ako ang laging may kasalanan. Hindi ko alam kung bakit.
Chelsia was a cheerleader who had taken an interest in me before graduation. Madalas sila sa field mag practice noon kaya tuwing may soccer training, she's always there, watching us sometimes.
It didn't take long before we started dating. Maiikling panliligaw before she said yes to me. The first year was fine, almost as if everything was perfect... not until she suddenly broke up with me over the phone.
"I don't want this anymore, Jaxton. Maghiwalay na tayo!"
"That's it? You're not even going to face me as you say those words? Harapin mo ako. What's your reason, Chel? Nakahanap ka na ng iba?"
"Yes! And believe me she's a lot better than you are! Masyado ka nakakasakal, Jax! You are so uptight and boring! No wonder, kahit na sobrang talino mo at gwapo maraming umaayaw sayo!" she told me over the phone.
She?
I thought I was just imagining things when I saw Chelsia with a girl the other day. Asar pa sa akin noon ni Isaac na nakita niya raw si Chelsia na may kahalikang babae sa parking.
"I only dated you because I thought you don't do serious relationships. I dated you because my parents wouldn't want to see me dating a girl."
I felt my fists clenched at what she said. Tangina. Para akong tanga! How come I didn't notice?
"But when I heard that you were about to propose to me?" I heard her scoff. "Really, Jaxton? At this age, you'd really want to marry me, huh? Are you that stupid?"
A few days ago, I consulted a jewelry store for a proposal ring. Buong akala ko, si Chelsia na talaga ang para sa akin. We were stable, we didn't fight and I had no problems with her over boys because she's naturally ignoring them.
Yun pala... hindi lalaki ang dapat kong ikabahala. She was into girls all this time and I was just someone she used because her parents are a bunch of homophobics.
"So that's it? Hindi mo manlang ipapaliwanag sa akin ito? You'll just leave me, just like that?"
"I have no responsibility over your feelings, Sandoval. I am going to date this girl. Subukan mo lang sabihin ito kay Mommy and I'm going to fucking kill you." she said as she ended the call.
I scoffed. She knows that no matter how bad my attitude is, I won't out her to her parents without her consent. That's just below the line. Kahit gaano pa ako kagalit, I can never out someone who's scared about coming out and telling their parents who they really love.
