The Golden Demi God and Jessica! ,The Hastings,Book 3

Chapter 41

"Thank you Jessica" I said pushing open the door, letting me out onto the hallway.

"Anything for you mama", I heard Jessica say when I was closing the door.

As I stepped outside Jessica and James room, I smoothed the satin midnight blue gown with the palms of my hand, gavering courage to move on down these stairs I had walked up and down from a young gauche girl of 12.

One foot stepped onto a stair then another as I made my way downstairs towards the formal dining area, where all the parties or gatherings were held.

(Ever since I can remember from the age of 12 when I was not allowed downstairs at certain times because of parties or formal dinners for my older sisters cominh of age.)

Taking a deep breath in I felt rather gauche all over again not the wise 48 year old woman I am, feeling the beat of my heart race when I heard voices laughing gaily at something someone said.

The laughter was coming from dear mother in law Hermione about something Eva said across the table. I did not understand the conflict between my mother Victoria or Hermione only that the man was Alexander's father. Mother never really showed me any love at all the way she did Melisande, Petunia or Christopher for that matter, I was the unwanted one I choose to think put out really.

Soon I was near the enclosed door in front of me, all I needed to do was push them open and glide in a happy merry wife but I didn't feel happy at all.

How could I repair all this in one night I thought?, All I could think about was Arabella, would she forgive the mean words we said to her?

I wonder if mother knew who this girl was in the past?, the one whom we were told to stay away from.
Knowing my mother I suspect the answer was a flat out no!

Reaching out a hand I placed onto the wood paneling to push open the door, I felt sick not at all ready to face the woman we all turned our backs on.

Straightening my posture, I took a large gulp and proceeded to push open the doors stepping inside after a moment of reflection.

Heads turned hearing the doors open behind me and I saw James smile a cynical one because he knew of what I and many others did to his mother.

The past had finally caught up!

Victoria held up her glass in front of her eye inspecting me as if I was an insect. "Lizzie" she murmured aloud and I flinched at the nickname which I hated.

"At last you have decided to grace us with your presence at the dinner table dear" her voice sarcastic sweet. If the floor would open up and swallow me up I'd be very blessed right now.

Hermione sat back watching the goings on with interest.

Moving on to where I sat across from Alexander he sent me a quizzical glace why did I run away so fast?

By now I wanted to hit someone!

I looked down before a servant pulled a chair out and I seated myself on the chair. Turning towards Alexander I sent him a forget it one shrugging off the drama of around an hour ago.

How I hated being here surrounded by people who were not perfect but always showed they were.

After a while I relaxed with all the chatter going on around the table maybe because of the drink being poured into wine glasses. I drank and ate not really in the mood for idle chatter at the point until someone made me talk about the past.