Crazy Conversations

5

july 28 2015

My best freind Jeff gave meh a gift today, why?? i dont fucking know but he is just WTF

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Jeff: EYYYYYYYY

Me: So, I see theres some shit in ur hands! WTF

Jeff: Its a gift... FOR U! U DICK!

Me: OH.. what is it?

Jeff: its shit

Me: wow... i knew it was shit in ur hands

Jeff: no, its shit but its not actually shit dude, open it

Me: u serius, its like round and looks like it came from ur ass

Jeff: my poo isnt that big, just open it b4 i throw it at u

Me: AWW jesus NO! u better fucking not! Anyway! Why is it wrapped in khristmas paper!?

Jeff: Cus, i dint have any other wrapping paper and its an early christmas present heh

Me: tell me its not a dildo

Jeff: WTF no, dont tell me ur gay

Me: WTF no! just saying, what else could it b??

Jeff: a dildo

Me: D:

Jeff: jk man

Me: if u got me a dildo, i going to fucking throw it at some horny gay guy if i see one

Jeff: haha nice

Me: -.- just give me the gift

Jeff: ok *hands gift over*

Me: *opens it*

Jeff: see, its a...

Me: Its a...... fucking potato.... -_-

Jeff: haha yeah, i found it at a store but it was on the floor so... i asked some teenage guy who works ther and he said, "ew, u should take it..'

Me: Wow thats just-

Jeff: I WASNT DONE TALKING U IDIOT!

Me: sheesh...

Jeff: I said thanks and he said, dont feed it to the poor cuz its fool of bacteria and yeah..

Me: So... u want me to eat this potato? U saying im POOR?

Jeff: What no! its a gift so i could fucking have a food fight with this bacteria infected fucking potato u asshole!

Me: well, im not going to touch it.. its fucking infected and YOU touched it!

Jeff: Potato touch! MUHAHA, im going to infect you, u bastard!

Me: Fuck you man!

Jeff: -_- its a- a gift for you! TAKE IT!

Me: Bitch please, i aint touching no fucking potato! i hate potatoes!

Jeff: Thats just rude to the potato fucking nation!

Me: So, i dont care!

Jeff: We cannot be friends if u hate potatoes!

Me: u never knew i disliked potatoes until this very day, wow! you dont know anything bout me!

Jeff: Potato hater...

Me: So...

Jeff: Wait, you dont like french fryes?

Me: NO, its not good, its like mooshy and and dont get me started on the loads of salt..

Jeff: wow, ur crazy

Me: im sorry, i dont like potatoes. dont like em roasted, baked fried and whatever u can do with potatos.

Jeff: Well, keep the potato!

Me: NO i dont accept ur gift!

Dad: Give me that potato!

Jeff: It aint for u -.-

Me: Its for the hobos.

Jeff: ur a hobo..

Me: oh, now ur sayin im poor, nice...

Jeff: eh, idc if ur poor, ur still my friend!

Me: i never said i was poor...

Dad: we r not poor, were middle class *takes the potato and throws it at me so hard*

Me: what the fuck dad!? that fucking hurt! its like you shot me!!

Dad: ik, i was trying to target practice on the loser.

Jeff: hehe ur the loser... XD

Me: wtf dad, ur going to give me a fucking bruise!!

Dad: u deserved it for what u done to my car, u put a dent in it from throwing a rock at it the other day. its revenge bitch

Me: wow yeah, at least I DINT HIT U WITH A ROCK!

Jeff: Wow! family is awesome aint it :P

Me: No, no it isnt... -_-

Dad: well, ill be going out now so u two can chill *leaves*

Me: its ur fault Jeff cuz u got a fucking potato

Jeff: Ur dad is so nice :)

Me: hahah... NO

My dad is so nice, id love to get hit by a potato again.... NOT. But still it was funny and yeah pain is only temporary so yeah..