SaiLem Three {DANGER: I'm Falling For You}

10. Nobody's Perfect

Kulang pa ba ‘yung drama? O eto, mas madrama.. hahaha… -__-“ sareh, madrama rin si otter ngayon eh.

-Hunny

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Cyann

So, she really did put down my pictures, I sigh to myself at ni-lock ko na ‘yung phone ko. No wonder, kanina pa may mga nagte-text sa’king girls asking me if I’m okay and if I want someone to talk to. They must really think I’m the victim and Clementine just used me when in fact, it’s the other way around.

Naalala ko tuloy ‘yung mga sinabi niya last night. She’s insulted for being my girlfriend pala. Hindi man lang niya sinabi sa’kin para sana I was able to do something.

…ayokong dumagdag sa mga alalahanin mo…

Her words keep ringing in my ears like a broken record. Oo nga pala, kahit nung ginamit ko ‘yung account niya the first time and I posted my photos all over her page, meron nang mga hate messages and comments. Kahit sinabihan ko na ‘yung mga girls na huwag lalapitan si Lem, I hadn’t realized that women can be very vicious too.

Thinking about it all, I want to punch myself in the face until I’m numb.

Ginamit ko si Clementine to my own ends when it was too obvious that she doesn’t want to get involved with me in any way. But still, I insisted. Thinking that it was to our advantage. Hindi ko nga naman naisip na, ako LANG ang nakinabang. I reaped the benefits while she had the downsides of it all.

What a terrible thing I did to her. I’m such an asshole.

Kaya hindi ko rin siya masisi kung bakit sobrang galit siya sa’kin kagabi and probably until now. I wanted to explain myself to her last night, but how would I do that without spilling that she was the reason why I couldn’t go back. Lalabas lang na sinisisi ko siya.

That’s why all that I came up with was to repeatedly apologize to her without realizing how immense the trouble I caused her.

She was right, ‘sorry’ wouldn’t do. Akala ko nga, sasampalin niya ako eh. Actually, I would have preferred a hard slap on the face than be shot by her words that really cut me deep. I think I’m going to be hurt by her words for the rest of my god-damned life because she made me realize that I’m such a douche.

“Good morning,” Sharelle rolls over to face me with a shy smile and my thoughts somehow dissolve into thin air.

I gave her a brief smile. “How are you feeling?”

She bites her lower lip and looks down sheepishly. “Better, I think. I really caused a scene last night, right? Nakakahiya.”

“Don’t worry about it,” tipid kong sagot sa kanya and I feel her bare skin rub against me. I realize that she’s still almost naked under the blanket. But unlike last night, hindi na nagawang mag-react ng katawan ko.  “You want water?”

“Yes please.”

Nodding, I swing my legs over the bed, stand up and drag myself to the kitchen. Dumiretso ako sa water dispenser where I pour myself a glass of water. Then, I train all my senses at Clementine’s door, trying to determine kung nandun pa ba siya. Last time I checked my watch, it was just nine on a Monday morning. Ibig sabihin, parehas kaming walang class.