'Dear, God?'
Dear God, listen to me one more time,
I feel like a fool, I feel like a mime,
I begged to you more than a hundred times,
Did you hear me? Do I need to spend more dimes?
God? Please? Did you hear me?
Take my pain away if you may, is there any fee?
Are you there? I'd pay, I promise. I'll be good, I'll be nice,
Let me breath one more time, no matter the price.
I am dwelling in my own sorrow, my own grief,
My own woe. Myself, I tried to grieve,
Bleeding on paper, but the ink dried up,
No water to drink, I was left with a cup.
No one sees me losing when I caged myself,
No one sees me crying when I'm the only one left,
I want to run away, I want to leave,
Even for a moment, a time that is brief.
No one hears the thumping sound of my heart,
No one hears it breaks into million shards,
My anxiety, I try to soothe at night,
Will it calm down? I've tried with all my might?
How hard it is to ask for help?
Why can't I say something, why can't I yelp?
If I drown this one time, should I let go?
Will I finally be at peace? I want to know.
I am spent, weary, and tired,
So much... I am exhausted,
It showed in every hitched of my breath,
The kind of fatigue that can only be cured by death.
tamat
-2026
