tape → narry au

18 → hypophrenia

Hypophrenia:
a feeling of sadness seemingly without a cause.

Day five, and yes I'm counting, of Niall not bothering to notice my existence.

He did notice me for about a second when he caught onto my gaze yesterday at group session—immediately shooting me a glare that caused me to stare down at the wooden table for the remainder of time.

Once group session came to an end, I practically ran out of the group cabin and towards cabin nine. That being the most tranquil place at the moment.

I knew Niall was going to involve himself, and most likely others, in an activity-- I'd have our cabin to myself.

I did.

So I did what I knew best, lock myself away inside keeping to myself. It was better that way.

The sound of Niall's footsteps awoke me later on the same day. It was a little after Tape's curfew and Niall's trainers were creating such a heavy rhythm that he had awoken me out of my sleep. The loud pats were so melodramatic that I had thought they were deliberate.

No matter how loud he was I didn't dare sit up. There wasn't any point to—

Niall would most likely shoot me the most hardest glare as he did earlier and cause the already tensional atmosphere to worsen. All the same it was already horrid and I still couldn't do a thing about it so I went back to sleep.

It wasn't as difficult since the extremely loud noises originating from Niall had eventually died down.

-

The next morning I awoke later than usual. The first thing I did was look across the cabin room to the left to see Niall had already left our cabin, leaving me asleep.

In all honesty I wasn't able to get use to the different routine with Niall not being around in the morning. I had grown accustomed to leaving our cabin with him and preparing ourselves for the full day together, and to not have that currently felt odd.

Of course I still showered and got ready for the day though, I hadn't any clue on what or where to go. I was just certain I didn't want to stay in my cabin for the whole Thursday alone with my thoughts.

I had already decided to stay as far away from the canteen as possible. But that would be nearly impossible.

I would have retrieve waters and sometimes small foods if I felt like I was dying from hunger, like the current.

I hadn't ate my usual fruits or crackers since Tuesday though I had survived on a few bottled waters during those missing days.

By the time I had exited from cabin nine my mind had already been made up on the future destination-- canteen.

It wouldn't be a stay an hour kind of visit, but instead a grab saltines and water whilst immediately leaving the canteen kind of visit.

But that all flew out of the window once Liam noticed me standing near the canteens entrance door. My head shot up from its gaze set on the floor to the sound of his familiar voice once I heard the usual greeting of:

"Harry, mate!"

I inwardly sighed as I made my way towards the table where he was sat. Taking me more steps than usual to realise whom Liam was surrounded by. Not at all appalled to see Louis seated beside Liam with Ed and Niall sat across from the pair.

Ed turned to face me once I reached their table, greeting me with a bright toothily smile. I hesitated before returning the smile. Louis waved at me whilst excitedly shouting my name though I was practically feet away from him. But that's just Louis for you—louder than average.

"Harry!" the sound of his voice alone caused me to smile. This time a more realistic grin.

I waved timidly, uttering, "Hi Louis."

"Sit with us, yeah?" he asked suggestively.

Ed and Liam nodded in agreement and I didn't feel too comfortable about that idea since the only vacant seat was across from Niall, next to Louis. Certain Niall didn't want me sat across from him or near him in general.

"No. I'm not feeling too well," I lied. Placing my hand on my stomach to emphasise my point.

Louis waved me off. "Nonsense," he spoke pointing to the empty seat beside him, "You can sit here."

I nodded shyly whilst murmuring a compliance defeatedly, seating myself in the vacant chair. Once I sat down, I didn't dare look up from the focus I had on the wooden table for one reason; Niall.

I didn't want to see the directed glare for me similar to the other day or any facial features that hinted he utterly loathed me because it'll only make me more uncomfortable and plain confused since I didn't know the reason(s) why he despised me so much.

I didn't want him to despise me at all, but it was already too late for that one.

"Do you want anything?" Liam asked causing me to look up from the gaze I had on the wood.

"Only water, that's all," I answered. "But I'll get it-"

Niall pushing a bottled water towards me, cutting me off mid-sentence.

I grabbed ahold of the bottle before it fell, looking up to smile at Niall as a way of saying thank you and a way of silently pleading him to speak to me again.

The dirty look on his face immediately killed all of the built up hope that and that was enough for me to leave the canteen cabin.

I clutched onto my stomach more dramatically than I did earlier.

"I'm feeling more worse," I informed them wholeheartedly. I did, indeed, feel worse now after that malice look from Niall, but I didn't tell them that. Especially Niall, it might give him some satisfaction.

Liam frowned as I stood up from the seat, still determined to not look Niall's way again.

"Feel better mate," he wished.

"Thanks," I mumbled.

"Yeah mate, get better so we can go fishing," Louis commented.

I replied, sighing, "Yeah."

"So we can flip another boat. Right Niall?" Ed then said. I could hear the smile in his tone as well as Niall's loud huff of a response.

With that I escaped the canteen realising it was a terrible idea to go there in the first place.
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A.N;  How soon do you think Niall and Harry will be speaking to one another?

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Good Night and Good Morning to wherever you are and happy reading, always!