tape → narry au

epilogue → saudade

Saudade:
a nostalgic longing to be near again to something or someone that is distant, or that has been loved and then lost; "the love that remains."

6 months later...

I watch Liam coddle himself into Louis's lap. Making himself comfortable as Louis encases his arms around Liam's stomach affectionately. Louis then resting his chin upon Liam's shoulder whilst making funny face directly at me.

I shake my head at him fondly, turning my head to glance at Ed coddling into Bean tenderly also. The couple whispering low and softly to one another so no one around was able to hear.

So this is what my friends have become-- affectionate 'friends,' but I don't mind: if they're happy, I'm content.

Even if I was the fifth lagger with no one to my companion or passion, I was pretty satisfied with it and that was because my affection never dampened towards Niall. It never will.

There wasn't a day that would dawn nor dusk by where Niall didn't cross my mind constantly.

Not a week would pass by without finding myself scanning through the makeshift journal, rereading entries for the nth time with no sense of boredom forming at all, because it was Niall.

My Niall.

Mine.

Even if he's been gone for around seven months now. The fresh effect's still there; active.

"Wanna hear a joke, Harry?" Ed brings me from my inward thoughts. A sly grin etching its way onto his face.

Ed and I were pretty cordial whilst we were at Tape, but after he found his escape and contacted Liam, the group of us gradually got to know one another more.

Yet that didn't alter the awkward experience we all went through with our first group encounter.

It did get better, though.

Ed had Bean relaxing upon his lap once I turn to face him. Giving him a small nod to continue on.

Ed claps his hands together loudly. "Why did Sally fall off the swing?" he questions, everyone else snickers as Ed stares at me.

Guess everyone is familiar with the banter.

I shrug, "I don't know, why?"

"Because," Louis answers before Ed's even able to, Ed grumbles at Louis for his eagerness. "She didn't have any arms!"

Everyone laughs, I blink. "What? That isn't funny!" I protest.

"But wait," Ed says. "It gets better."

I nod simply for him to continue on, still far from amused at this so called joke.

"Knock knock," Louis chimes, Ed glares warningly at Louis.

"Who's there?" I ask.

"Not Sally," Ed grins broadly, everyone laughs loudly whilst I stare blankly at the missing humour.

"I don't get it," I grumble. "That isn't funny."

Everyone continues to laugh as the winter wind blows. I hug the sleeves of mine, Niall's, hood tighter to keep warm. The burgundy material carding through my fingers slowly as I take in every astonishing detail I'm certain I've memorised.

The fit didn't match with my shape as well as it matched with Niall's. The sleeves were longer than the length of my arms and the hood fit me like an oversized sweater, but I liked it because it once belonged to Niall.