Forced to marry him! Completely re-edited

Intruder

Zayns POV:

"First things first" Megan lectured as we walked down aisle upon aisle of women's clothing. "let your pregnant wife slap you, as many times as she wants and as hard as she wants."

I stopped walking giving Megan a weird look. I had specifically called her here for "good" advice, since she was the only "pregnant" women who could fill me in on a pregnant women's perspective.
I frowned clearly not buying her lame rules "why would I let her abuse me when she basically does it every time?"

"Because...." Megan shrugged letting her hands trail across a rack of dresses. "it just makes a women feel better." She turned to me with a smile bigger than a kid on Christmas. "We like abusing men, trust me. You don't know how many times I hit Derek, it just makes us happy." She said rubbing her swollen belly. "And with all the hormones raging through Lexi, she's gonna feel the need to abuse you every time! And why not abuse the man who got her pregnant in the first place?!" Megan exclaimed.

I groaned not the blaming thing again. " for the last time, It was an accident! I didn't mean to get her pregnant!" I exclaimed. She just would not drop this topic. The next time she blamed me I was literally going to rip of my hair.

"So what! It was your sperm that filled her vagina." She basically shouted out loud. Like you literally did not need a loudspeaker, I'm sure the whole store heard her.

"You know..." I said stuffing my hands in my pocket and rocking on the balls of my feet. "I don't need the whole world knowing how I got my wife pregnant."

Megan shrugged and began looking through the clothes. Then paused. "-what if my water broke?....like right this minute?!"

I glanced at her "I'd make sure I dropped everything -including you- and run away." I sarcastically said.

Megan punched my arm -hard, might I had. "Rule number two: always be a gentlemen to your pregnant wife. Or she'll have no choice but to hit you extremely hard."

I rolled my eyes, it wasn't like I was going to follow any of these rules. They seemed stupid and nothing like what Lexi would follow. In fact I'm sure Megan was doing this to piss me off. It had been a while since she had irritated her best friends husband.

"So, should I get her this?" I asked picking up the closest dress.

Megan scrunched up her nose "are you trying to tell her she's fat?!" She said crossing her arms and glaring at me. I was extremely confused, the dress seemed fine to the point with would never make Lexi look fat. There were so many clothes, all different colours and sizes that I didn't know which one to get for Lexi. However I had a feeling that in order to win lexis forgiveness it would come down to more than just a dress.

"Rule number three: never call your wife fat- or say anything that rhymes with fat." She said Taking the dress away from me. "I think we might be looking in the wrong shop, I know Lexi and she's not just going to forgive you just like that. I think you need to....prove to her your capable of being a father."

"The what do we do?"

~~*~~
Lexis POV:
Our new house was pretty amazing , I had to give Zayn credit. The external structures of the house were literally breathtaking......but inside....it basically took your breath away. He had managed to suit both his needs and mine making this house.......a real dream house.