Can I just say the only thing I have going for me right now is the fact that I got tickets to see 5SOS next year.
Like, seriously, I hate my life.
High school sucks.
I try to tell my friends in younger grades that everything Mrs Douchette (remember her?) says is total bullshit, but at this point I've had so many mental breakdowns that I've had to go to guidance like five times in the past month.
I literally started crying during my social studies class because I went to check my grades online at the beginning of class and I found out I have a 76 in Biology.
I MISSED ONE QUIZ
WHICH I HAVE NOW MADE UP
AND MY GRADE IS STILL LIKE THAT
THE QUARTER ENDED YESTERDAY
IF I HAVE A C ON MY REPORT CARD I DON'T KNOW WTF I'M GOING TO DO BECAUSE THIS HAS NEVER HAPPENED TO ME BEFORE AND I DO NOT WANT IT TO
I hate everything...I can't complain to my friends because all but like one of them don't understand but I'm only in one class with this girl and we don't even sit near each other.
Also I'm pretty sure I have a sexual preference to girls.
Whoops.
#stillhaventcomeouttomyfamily2K15
Also I keep having this weird, messed-up thought in my head of what would happen if I were to die, like how it would affect my followers on here and my friends and family and everyone around me and I keep picturing my own funeral and it's scaring me...
I haven't told anyone but a few of my friends about it, though...
I'm just getting really scared for myself because I really want to talk to my brother about all of this, but I haven't had the opportunity to in a while but I'm going to see him in like two weeks because he's coming up for the weekend to see me in West Side Story (totally not terrified for that, seeing how I'll be performing in front of a couple thousand people in the Shubert Theater [look it up] and no pressure there). I just want some private time to talk to him for a really long time because he's told me he's facing a bunch of mental problems in college too and I just feel like we could be so much closer than we used to be but both of us are so busy now that there's no time.
I hate everything 😩
Except that there's now a middle finger emoji 🖕🖕🖕🖕
Using that in the future.
-Cat
