In A Relationship With BaekHyun of Exo: His Fearless Sasaeng

24: He's Here

ERRORS AHEAD

I know you've missed me but I'm really sorry for being so busy and having a severe writer's block. This chap isn't so good because I can't find the Nam Sora in me but yeah, I still tried. ;)

Enjoy! Love you xx

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I slowly stood up and came in front of him, I kept on blinking because I can't fucking believe that he'll come back. Why would he even come back? He hates me. Damn. I'm probably hallucinating right now.

I turned around and shook my head, "No, no. I'm just being crazy again."

"Ani," I stiffened when I heard him speak, "I came back for you."

Asshole. I looked at him with fury in my eyes, my lips quivered and my voice cracked as I ask him, "W-why did you come back?" He had the chance! I didn't even take him back regardless of how much I missed him for I don't want him to suffer because of me anymore. Why is he here? He's not supposed to be here even if I want to.

He dropped his bag and pulled me into his arms, "I missed you." I didn't hug him back even though I'm dying to. I don't want to feel fine just because he's here right now, I don't want to be more devastated when he leaves again.

What is this? Why am I like this? Aren't I supposed to be hugging him and kissing his lips by now? And then he leaves again tomorrow.

I was missing him the whole day but here I am, fucking pushing him away. I feel so bipolar like shit. Even I, myself don't understand how my mind works. I want him here but I won't give him a tiny chance to leave me again. He's done it twice before and tried doing it a hundred of times. Damn. I am so tired of chasing him and feeling the chaos all over my world when he does leave.

"Didn't I tell you that the next time you plan slitting your wrist, you should do it on your neck?"

Damn it.

I moved away from him and looked at his eyes with horror, "So you're here to kill me, aren't you?" I held the door open for him and smirked, "I will kill myself later. You can leave now." I've been killing myself everyday. Even those nightmares kill me everytime. There's no need to exert any effort.

He dropped his bag on the floor and came closer to me. I thought that he was really going to leave and that he just dropped that bag of his as my last souvenir from him, but no, he didn't. Instead, he grabbed the door's handle from me and closed it. "Look, I'm sorry if I said anything wrong but that's not what I meant. I just want you to stop hurting yourself," but you keep on hurting me every damn time, Baekhyunah.

I rolled my eyes on him and turned around, heading to my room that used to be our room. "Lie better." I mumbled before closing the door locked. He can stay for the night if he wants, as what I've told him before, this house is open for him 24/7. Whatever happens, this house will be ready to keep him safe and sound.

I slowly tucked myself to bed. No sleep tonight again, I guess. He's here. Byun Baekhyun is here and he can't witness what happens to me everytime I sleep. He's witnessed it once and that is more than fucking enough.

I heard him knock on the door, "Sora."

"Kojo." (Get lost.) I should be the one who needs to lie better. I keep on asking him to leave but my fucked up heart says otherwise.

Why do we call this love? It should've been self-destruction. No freaking explanations needed.

Baekhyun, get fucking lost. Get fucking lost with me. With the long lost me.

I stared at the door, he didn't talk back. He didn't say anything, didn't knock again. I wonder if he left. Of course, he will. He always runs away, yet he keeps on coming back too.

My brows furrowed when I saw the door unlocking by itself. What the actual fuck? And then it opened. With Byun Baekhyun standing by the doorway with a hairpin on his hand. Damn it! I taught him how to unlock a door the sasaeng way. Now I regret doing so. He shouldn't look at me. I'm a damned monster.

He walked away and came back to hand me a glass of milk. I raised my hand to stop him, "A monster doesn't need that. A criminal doesn't deserve that. And I am both in your eyes so just get the fuck o--"

I wasn't able to finish my sentence when I felt his lips on mine. Golddamn it! I missed his illegal lips! I need to stop. Fuck. Nam Sora, you need to stop this instant! My body has its own mind because instead of pulling away, I pulled his nape closer to me to deepen the kiss. Fuck---shit! Damn! I missed him, I missed him so much!

I didn't know what he did but the next thing I knew, I was sitting on his lap. I love you, asshole. I love you too much that I'm afraid to open my eyes and realize that everything is just a bullshit dream.

He slowly pulled away and pressed his forehead against mine, I closed my eyes and clenched my jaw. I'm damned, fully damned after this deal.

"After that night when you had a nightmare I noticed that you never slept again. I want to ask you why but I don't know if I have a right. So please, just drink this milk. It'll help you sleep."

I sighed standing up, and grabbed the glass of milk, drinking it one shot. If that's what he wants then who am I to say no? I'm his fearless sasaeng. I fear nothing. Except him. And God, of course.

I tucked myself back to bed again and turned my back on him. Today's a rough day, I mean yesterday. I can see the sun starting to rise, start of day 24. I smiled bitterly, last 4 days. "You should grab a sleep, Baekhyun."

I felt the bed shift and his arms were suddenly wrapped around me. Fuck, I mumbled to myself. Is there even a way to save myself from drowning too much? He turned me around and pulled me closer, his arms still wrapped around my waist. I buried my face on his neck, sniffing his scent. I cursed, he smells so damn good. This is so unfair.

Maybe I really am insane. Loving him too much. Pushing him away then sleeping next to him like I can't live without him.

I don't want someone who comes back, I want someone who stays but if he can't stay with me then I'll stay for him just like how the mole stays on his thumb.