July 15, 6:25 pm.
For once in my life, I can finally put myself in first place. I finally allow myself to take the risk and be happy. I have gone through too much stuff. I have to forget what I want and remember what I deserve. That sounds kind of strange coming from my own mouth, but it's something I have to keep telling myself. Everyone deserves a chance to be happy, even I. And also even if sometimes, something inside me whispers that I'm trying to replace what I truly want. Well, I want Cameron, I really do. He's always been there for me when you should have been. He has been there for me in ways you never were. He made me smile when you made me cry and he makes me feel happy, you know? But there's also you. I keep trying to fight those feelings. I keep telling myself that it will be so much easier to forget you. To not be selfish for at least once in my life and let you go. But sometimes, when it's at the latest hours of the night, my mind tells me that I really can't.
I can't let you go. Or maybe, I just don't want to.
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