The Diary of an Unintentional Puck Slut

May 17 2013

*May 17, 2013*

Dear Diary,

There are no words for the emotions I am feeling right now.

I feel so violated and used, and horrible. I just want to disappear!

Last week Cam talked me into taking some 'sexy pictures' for him. He promised they were for him only, just so he could look at me when he was away on his internship this summer.

I was wearing some fancy bra and matching thong he'd bought online. He said I wasn't being sexy enough so he kept pouring me shots.

I guess I eventually opened up, and he thought it would be a good idea to take a video of me too. Without telling me.

He had also been drinking, but he knew what he was doing. He pushed me back on the bed, and tied my hands to the headboard. I struggled against him and tried to get my hands free, so he slapped me. I don't recall why, but I laughed. I think it was because I was so shocked that he had done that.

So he hit me again, harder. I was so drunk I kept laughing. I couldn't feel it that much, I couldn't really feel anything.

He hit me several more times and then started having sex with me. It probably would have really hurt if I hadn't been so drunk.

I don't remember too much after that, except him hitting me, and my head slamming into the head board.

When I came to I wasn't tied up, but my wrists hurt. I was still wearing that stupid bra, but I couldn't find any of my clothes. Or Cam.

Fast forward to yesterday afternoon and I come home from work to find my facebook page has been hacked. By Cam.

He posted the video and some of the pictures on my page from my account, and then he pretended to be mad about it. He said I was cheating on him or something. He had angled the camera so you couldn't see his face or tell who he was, but you could definitely see me.

How could he do that to me?

It was hard, but I ended things with him.

Why did I ever put up with him? It's been three and a half years and I'm just realizing how much of a jerk he is.

This is so embarrassing! I graduate tomorrow, and then I hope to get as far away from here as possible.

Sincerely,

Emme

P.S.: I deleted my facebook account, but he still has those pictures on his computer.