The Diary of an Unintentional Puck Slut

September 24, 2013

Sept. 20, 2013

Dear Diary,

Nope, not an STD.

It’s almost worse because there’s nothing I can do about it.

I’m allergic to condoms.

I’m allergic to fucking condoms!!!!

This must be Karma somehow, for sleeping with too many hockey players in such a short amount of time. (Though Brandon and I have yet to actually complete it).

How have I never noticed this? When Cam and I had sex we never used them because he didn’t like them, and I was on the pill so it was okay.

My doctor put me on a new type of oral contraceptive that’s supposed to be much stronger, and she said that I should be okay if I’m really good about taking it every day at the same time (which has never been a problem).

The hardest part was telling Sid.

“Aren't there other kinds of condoms? Ones that aren't made of latex?” He asked after looking the condition up on his phone (I’m not sure he believed me).

“There are, but it’s not exactly a latex allergy. My doctor said it had something to do with the way it creates friction and reacts with the um, natural lubrication created by, the, um. You know. And I’m apparently allergic to artificial lube too, so that sucks.” Talking about sex with Sid was really awkward. Probably because he is so cute and polite (and awkward).

We left it at that. I think we both knew what this meant and we didn’t really want to go into too many details yet. He did seem to relax a bit when I told him that my ex boyfriend and I had hardly ever worn a condom in the nearly four years that we dated, and nothing bad ever happened.

I spent the rest of the day reading Jane Austen’s Persuasion. Nobody in her novels had problems like this. Instead they just waited months for a letter from some guy they met once and fell in love with.

The Penguins second pre-season home game is tomorrow, which means I have to skate again. I am feeling a lot less nervous, but I still spent most of Thursday at the ice working on stuff with Kate, the head ice girl, Caeleigh, Ashlyn, and a few other girls. Caeleigh came over after for another girl’s night, except this time we watched the Pens play the Blackhawks and talked about my weird allergy.

“The one good thing is that on this new birth control pill I will have super light periods, if any.” I said.

“I’m mad jealous,” Caeleigh replied.

“Yeah, except the side effects can be way worse than the normal pill. Like getting sick and stuff.” I explained. “My doctor said most people don’t like this medicine because of them, but in my case it’s better to have stronger medicine.”

When I tried to ask her about Geno she just blushed. “You didn’t, did you?”

“No,” she sighed. “But he said I was a better skater than you.”

“What?” I laughed. “I think he likes you. Or he knows nothing about figure skating.”

“Hey!” She said hitting me. “Just because your coach was an Olympic skater doesn’t make you better than me.”

“Whatever,” I said smiling, “That’s cute that he thinks that though.”

I’m starting to wonder if Caeleigh is going to visit every time Sid’s away. She picked out her favorite guest bedroom and has some clothes and stuff in it. We have a lot of fun talking about boys and clothes and stuff. Girly things.