Sex, drugs, and Wes Gregory

Chapter twenty six

Tears stream down my face, pooling on wen's pillow, a daily occurrence that I have become used to.

Sobs escapes my lips as I pull my knees to my chest, laying on my side.

How could he do this to me? Hat did I do to make him want to kick me out?

Was it because I told him I loved him and he didn't want to say it back? If not that then what could it be.

My body aches from the loss of him. My mind is gone due to the absence of him.

I can't eat, I can't sleep, I can't even move.

It seems that the only thing I am able to do is cry and cry.

Even after a whole two weeks that have passed, I can't get the thought of him out of my head. I can't let him go, I can't make myself stop loving him.

My feels as if has seen ripped out of my chest by the only person I have ever loved.

And this time...he's not the one grieving due to the lack of company of each other.

Last time it was me who was going on living life as if nothing ever happened between us. Now it is Wes who seems to be doing just fine, he seems to not even remember that I had ever existed.

Maybe I was wrong.

Maybe Wes never really loved me like I thought he did. Maybe he never even had real feelings like I had for him. Maybe I was just fooling myself by thinking that he actually cared for me as I had cared for him.

The same thoughts run through my head every day. I can't think of anything else.

I need to be close to him; touch him, feel him, I need to be consumed with his intoxicating scent just one more time.

"Macy, you really need to move on" Wen says and I feel the bend dip in as he takes a seat next to me.

I can't even reply, I can't even look at him.

"It has been weeks. Yo can barely eat, I have to force you to do it." He tells me. "You haven't moved from the bed unless we are going to school. You need to do something."

I don't reply, I just continue to lay there, not moving a muscle.

"Fine" he sighs. "I'll be back in half an hour to check on you and you better be ready to get up or I'll be pouring water on you"

The door shuts and I continue to cry.

********************

Wes hasn't been to school for the past four days. There is absolutely no sign of him which is unlike him. Wes never missed school, he never has a reason to.

There must me something crazy going on for him to not be there.

Me: Wes...please....

My trembling hands grip my phone, staring at the screen, hoping and wishing for a text to come back

I've been trying to call and text him since the day he told me he wanted me out.

I've apologized for I don't even know what. I've pleaded for him to at least just text me back. I have done it all and I still can't seem to get through to him.

Me: How could you just throw me away like this? Throw us away? I don't understand what I did wrong.

Twenty minutes later...

Me: I can't stand not being with you. I miss your touch, you voice, you smell. It's killing me.

Ten minutes later...

Me: I'm not even sure if all of this is tearing you apart like it's tearing me apart. I need you, Wes.

Fifteen minutes later...

Me: all I need is a reply to my text to assure me that you still think about me, that I'm not just someone you kick to the curb.

After a good ten minutes of waiting for a reply that I'm almost positive that I'll never get, I get ready to throw my phone across the room...

...but something stop me...

A buzz of my phone in the palm of my hand as my arm arches back to get ready to throw, causes me to drop my arm and stare at the screen.

Wes: Macy

That is all the text reads. Nothing before and nothing after

My heart skips a beat and pounds wildly in my chest, sending me a ray of hope.

Me: Wes

Wes: I need you to leave me alone

Tears form at the brim of my eyes but I dry them up, still holding into the hope I have since I am now in contact with him once more.

Me: why? I don't get it.

Wes: I'm going through a hard time right now and I don't need your bullshit on top of it all.

The words sting but I continue on

Me: I can help, Wes. You know I can. Just tell me what's going on.

Wes: I'm asking you Macy...to leave me be.

I want to go off on him. I want to yell that he has some nerve to ask me to leave him be when I have been asking him to answer my simple question as to why he hates me so much now.

But I choose not to do that

Me: you know I can't do that

Wes: do me a favor and mind your own business. My worries aren't your worries and your worries aren't my worries anymore. I've cut ties between us.

I take a deep breath and attempt to shove his words out of my mind.

Me: cut the act, Wes. I can help you.

Wes: I stopped trying to save you so don't try to save me, Macy.

Me: where are you? I can come and we can talk about this.

Wes: leave me be

Realizing that he won't be telling me where he is, I ignore his cries to get me to leave him alone and get myself together before leaving the house to go find him.