Holding My Breath [Wattys 2016]

6 0 ~ C a e s a r

                 

Flashback ~ December 30, 2010

I look to my left, then my right, as I step out into the middle of the road, a smirk on my lips.

If you don't want to play, I'm not going to give you a choice.

The girl, the one who burns an eternal red flame, doesn't want to play. But I want her to win. I want her to do as I say, to find what I need her to find.

The only thing that can hurt fire, the only thing truly capable of smothering it, is water. So that's what I need to do. It's what I plan to do.

I will smother her flame, but I won't let it go out completely. I will let her drown, but I won't let her die.

Not just yet.

Fire is a tricky thing. It can spread if you don't control it. It can destroy if you don't tame it. But it will never completely be obedient. There is something wild in her fire, something rebellious and free that I want on my side.

I will contain this flame. And if it proves to be too unruly, to be too much of a problem, I can always find a fun way to put it out.

I pull out my phone, speaking into the group call. "Get in position."

Annabella Blake, that's her name. But to me, Anna, your name means nothing. I don't care about your family. I don't care about you.

All I want, all I plan to get, is that flame. I want your determination, that flare behind your eyes. I want whatever it is inside you that makes you keep fighting when others would have backed down.

I always get what I want.

And I don't care what the price is.

The sun is out, bright against the melting ice. I smile. Surely this is a sign.

Your car comes around the corner, pulling up onto the bridge. My contacts say that she is in the car. Her parents and her brother, too, but they are expendable. I don't need them. Only her.

Centering myself in the path of the car, I stand my ground.

I see the shock in the mother's eyes as she looks up to see me, her arms instinctively turning the wheel away.

I laugh. It's so pathetic, the fear that runs through her. She doesn't even think of running over me. She just drives right off the side of the bridge.

That's the difference between you and your mother. You think before you do something, but then make the wrong decision anyway.

I need that if I'm going to get what I want.

The deed is over in a matter of seconds. I look from side to side, then bend down to pick up a rock off the side of the bridge.

I stand. This is a race to the finish line, Anna. You may not realize it, that we are heading towards the same thing. You may think you are running from me, but really, you are just running to something else. Something we both want. You will realize this soon enough. You will understand if you would just accept that I will make you play.

I turn the smooth stone over in my palm a few times, then throw it out at the lake. I watch as it bounces off the surface of the water once, twice, three times.

I pull the phone back to my ear. "Okay, go get her."

I take a deep breath, looking out at the bright afternoon sky. The orange and red of the sunset remind me of her. Of her flare.

It will disappear for the night, but will always come again. An endless cycle.

"Sir, what about the boy?" I hear a buzz through the speaker.

I shrug. "Take him." He'll be a great inspiration to her, to make her obey me.

"And the parents?"

I look down at the water. I see a shadow interrupting the kaleidoscope colors reflecting from the sky. It's the car sinking, I know.

Your parents are useless. They know too much. You told them more than I can let them understand. Now, because of you, they are just a liability.

It's your fault I'm not going to let them live, Anna.

"Let them die. Just take the boy and girl."

I'm letting them drown because of her. Otherwise, she may never learn.

"Yes, sir."

I turn and walk along the bridge, heading to where I see your limp body being pulled up onto the bank.

I pull the note from my pocket, reading it over once more. It's the perfect message, the exact threat to put her in motion. I can't help but think of your reaction when you see it.

You, Anna, are going to be fun. I haven't had a new toy to play with in a while, and I think this race will be one that I will enjoy running. Let's just hope you don't get too boring too quick.

Because toys I don't need, I break.

That is something you will have to learn, Anna.

Your parents are nothing to me. You deserve to hold the weight of their deaths on your shoulders. It is your punishment. And your brother? I have plans for him too.

You are just like the store clerk, and everyone before him. The only difference is that I know you can get me what I want. I have enough to make you want to get it for me. I can do worse than this, Anna. I can make you pay if you don't obey.

If she doesn't impress me, if she still refuses to play, I will just have to have my fun in killing her.

And even after she gets me everything I need, even if she wins my games, killing her will be the best part.

She might not know it yet, but her death will be the finale.

The icing on the cake.

For now, I will spare you. But when I'm done with you, you're going to go out with a bang.

Find my photograph Anna, and then you can move past go. To find what I really need.

The photograph is your first test. And if you pass, I'll let your brother live long enough for you to get him back.

And then I will come to get you.

Ready, set, go, Anna.

Go fetch.