Life Has Never Been Good For Me Nor The Odds Is Ever In My Favor. I Have Been Stomped On Like Trash And Treated Like Shit. Everything Is Too Good To Be True Until One Night....
It Has Been Two Days Since We Lost Cyn Or Cyn Left Per Say. Ma Left To See If She Went Back To New York And Nicki And Stella Left To See If She Went To L.A. I Had To Stay Here And Wait So I Wouldn't Put The Baby In Danger. I've Been Crying, Holding A Picture Of Her Sleeping When I Fall Asleep.
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I Never Felt This Disconnected From Her And Wish She Was Across The House. That Would Let Me Know She's Safe. Mimi Asked For Her And I Couldn't Tell Her That Mommy Raned Away. To Top Today's Misery, Selene And Mari Death Certificates Came Today And Their Cremations. I Just Left Them In The Boxes And Run To The Bathroom. Deep Down I Wont Ever Get Over This Because It Wasn't Fair. From Now On, I'll Listen And Not Be Stupid.
I Finally See Why And What I Did Was Wrong. Ma Is Right About Me Being A Coward And I Feel Like One. Divorce Might Be Our Next Step If This Doesn't Make Us Stronger.
To Be Honest I Can't Stay In This House Any Longer Or I'll Die. I Go Into The Hallway Closet And Grab My Fur Coat
Boom!
All The Clothes Including The Bar Falls And I Had To Ease On My Knees. As I Get Half The Clothes But Into Racks, I See Feet And Feel Something Hard. I Immediately Throw Everything Out And See Cyn Pale And Brusied On The Floor.
" Omg Baby! Please Don't Die On Me Baby!" Crying As I Get Her Out The Closet And Put Her Into My Lap While I Hold The Back Of Her Neck Up And Slapping Her
She Wasn't Waking Up. So I Grab A Bottle Of Water And Poured It On Her Face. That's When Her Eyes Fluttered Open And You Can Barely Tell She Has Pupils.
" Hey Baby Its Me...Its Erica Baby. Thank God" Holding Her Into My Chest As She Starts To Cry
I Laid Her Down On The Pallet Of Clothes And Quickly Call The Towns Doctor As I Put Her Head In My Lap
" Hell-
" Yes Ruby Its Erica And We Need You. Cyn Has Been Out For Two Days Without Food And Water, Nor Taken Her Medicine In Months. She's In Pain And We Need You NOW!" Breaking Down As I Try To Keep Cyn Awake While On The Phone
" Okay...Ms.Mentana Calm Down For The Baby. I Am On My Way"
The Line Goes Dead And I Cradle Cyn In My Arms. She Just Stares At Me And She Looks Soulless. Her Eyes Start To Flutter Closed As Sweat Runs Down Her Face.
" No Baby..Just A Little Longer Please" Damping Her Face With A Cold Rag.
I Take Off Her Shirt And See The Belt Whips My Made. Mommy Gave Her A Black Eye And Her Body Looks Terrible. I Have Never Seen Her So White.
This Doctor Gots To Hurry The Hell Up Before I Lose My Wife Too
