Thorn (n.h)

XIX

NIALLS POV

We end up back at the hotel, Rose has been silent since I hurt her and she has every reason to be pissed. She unlocks the room door and storms into the room, straight to the bathroom, grabbing her suitcase along the way.

I take advantage of her being in the other room and remove the wet boxers and slide on clean ones as well as clean jeans and a shirt.

I feel like crap for hurting her, I didn't mean to and she should realize that. She emerges from the bathroom, her hair wet from a brief shower, white shorts and a floral tank top cover her.

"I'm so sorry," I start but she puts her hand up.

"Don't even start," she says and I run my fingers through my hair, "just leave it alone." Rose sits on our bed and slides some sneakers on over her bare feet and stands to look at me.

"What are we even doing, huh?" she comes and stops a few feet infront of me, "are we anything? I mean I sleep at your house we're at the beach together!"

I don't answer her and let her finish, she takes my silence negatively of course and continues.

"Do you even care if we are anything?" she asks crossing her arms over her chest.

"I don't know," I honestly don't. I know she's beautiful and she pisses me off but she helps me. Rose helps me when I have no idea what to do.

Rose shakes her head and looks at the ground.

"Then what am I doing? Does it even matter to you that I make sure you take your pill or make sure you're safe?" she looks me in the eyes and I have to tear my focus from her.

Rose's hands find my cheeks and force my gaze to meet hers, "do you even care about me? do I matter at all to you?"

She does matter to me. I want so much with her but I know I can't give her anything she needs. She needs stable, protection. while I can give her the latter I sure as fuck can't the first.

I remain silent and she releases my face, "I'm going to the corner store for some food and drinks," she leaves the hotel room, slamming the door behind her.

I sit on the squeaky bed and hold my head in my hands.

She's crazy.

She's beautiful too.

She obviously loves me or she wouldn't even be here right now.

I obviously love her if I'm here too.

Okay, maybe not love, that's a little too much to handle. I loved June despite how we got together and everything. Just the thought of her hurts.

Rose comes into the hotel, tossing a bag full of who knows what onto the chair by the window.

"Can I talk to you?" I ask and she nods, slowly coming and sitting beside me on the bed. I know I've got to tell her about June and now is as good a time as any.

"What?" she asks quickly, avoiding eye contact with me.

"I've gotta confess to you," now she looks at me, hopeful. "It's about June, my ex," Rose slouches and I feel terrible for bringing her up.

"What about her?"

"I," I take a breath and continue, "Louis doesn't like me because I stole June from him last year at a party," I confess and Rose looks at me confused. "She was this prim and proper princess then I got her upstairs long story short I asked her to marry me and she left me."

"You asked her to marry you?" she is obviously judging me and I don't blame her.

"I'm an idiot, it was the spur of the moment I guess," I shrug and look at her, but she won't look at me.