Family | n.s

f o r t y - t w o

Niall

My heart raced as I walked down the white corridors with Liam and Louis in tow. I have never been comfortable in this place, the stron smell of phenyl invading my senses the moment I stepped out of the elevator.Hospitals were never my favorite places to be but I have come here more often in my life.

Liam is starting to get irritated as I reach the desk. I pull him out of the stroller and in my arms. He has always disliked hospitals, having to come here more than once after his birth. It has been over an year since Liam has been here and I think he just realized this place.

I quickly enquire my appointment and take the pad from the lady as she says it will take fifteen minutes more. I walk back to the waiting area with the boys and sit down. Louis is asleep thankfully, we all know that ruckus but it is making Liam more anxious since I warned him not to wake Louis up. I saw him once as I started with my form that Liam was about to hit Louis, trying to wake him up.

I quickly pulled him and thrusted my mobile in his hands, the one thing I know he loves to play with, that I knew will keep him busy throughout his entire appointment.

I then filled out the form walking back to the desk. The receptionist took it and quickly checked with my files of the boys before taking the fees and handing everything with the bill to me.

I sat back down waiting for the boy's name to be called.

I nervously bit my lip as I looked around, Harry's papers in my folder. I decided to carry them to show it to the doctor. It was actually Perrie's idea.

I hope Harry is wrong and there is nothing wrong with my babies. I don't think I would able to live if something has to happen to my darlings. I can't do everything I had to do and go through with Liam all over again if it is going to be serious.

My own thoughts were beginning to give anxiety. Various scenarios flashing in front of my eyes. I hate Harry for making me go through this, for making me so worried and anxious. If it were not for him and his stupid theories I wouldn't be sitting here going out of my mind

I knew I should have quit my job and had given all of my time to the boys. If I would have been home more often then I might have noticed something and maybe this - whatever Harry is talking about, premature development shit wouldn't have happened.

Oh my god, are my babies okay? Will they be okay?

I stared at the only black clock on the right in front of me, almost glaring at it.

I wished Harry was here with me. He would have calmed me down.

The thought made my heart jump and I quickly shook my head.

I am mad at him right now. I can't possibly want him beside me.

I know at the back of my mind, my words are not true.

A loud voice boomed in the corridor calling out Liam and Louis name. And I never been more thankful. I got up quickly picking up Liam and trailed behind the nurse as he lead me to the cabin.

I entered greeting the doctor and quickly started ranting out everything. I don't care what he thought about me, but right now I was scared and all I needed were answers and for him to say

"Everything is fine Niall"

"But, what is all this then?!" I pointed to the papers I got from the internet, papers Harry had bookmarked and notes (charts) he had made. I watched anxiously from my seat as the doctor started studying everything.

In the mean time Louis woke up gorgily, about to cry loudly but I quickly pulled him out of the straps and cuddled him to me. He put his thumb back into his mouth and laid his head on my shoulder before he was struggling to get out of my arms.