Ranting, Raging, and General Fangirliness [FIRST OF MANY BOOKS] {COMPLETED}

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My feet are sunburned and they're in major pain
I feel like my stomach's dead and so is my brain
I'm dehydrated and smell like a bin
Wanna know how I got into the mess I'm in?
Well I'll tell you, but it won't be fun
So pull up a chair and sit down, everyone.
I went to sixflags and met myself a fan,
I went on Poltergeist and then the Superman,
I rode a waterslide and then I ate lunch,
But shot it all out before my fifth munch.
I tried to walk but tripped and fell
Onto solid concrete- isn't that swell?
I bled on my white swimsuit and tried my best to smile,
I wanted to keep having fun and to stay a little while,
But my parents soon found a dreadful plight,
I had a concussion and had lost my sight
Not completely, but my glasses were dead
I had scrapes on my knees and bumps on my head
I didn't know why they were so concerned,
I bumped my head a few minutes ago, or at least that's what I heard.
I don't remember how I got these wounds and bumps,
I could have been abducted by aliens, or contracted the mumps.
So yes, I feel like absolute poo,
And I'm gonna sleep, and so should you.