Shawn Mendes Imagines

Miscarriage

feels. . .

*Y/n's POV*

The lights glimmered against the mirrior as I stared at my reflection. The small bump of my pregnant stomach was clearly visible through my shirt and I smiled, running a hand over it.

I had to say, I was proud. Even as a little kid, almost every girl has a baby doll or plays "house" just dreaming of the day when it wouldn't be pretend anymore.

Shawn walked in the room behind me, snaking his arms around my waist. "We're going to the doctor toady right?" he calmly asked, kissing my temple.

"Yep," I said, turning around and almost jumping up and down with excitement, "It's finally going to be confirmed that we're having a girl!"

"I thought we agreed thinking that our baby will be a boy?" Shawn laughed.

"Well, I changed my mind," I followed him downstairs, holding his outstretched hand, "I just know it's going to be a girl."

Shawn grinned, "Whatever you say."

We hopped on the car, Shawn helping me inside, and drove the short drive to the doctor's office. We got out of the car and waited in the waiting room until our name was called.

"Y/n Mendes?" the nurse smiled, "Follow me."

Shawn's hand clasped tightly around mine as we followed the nurse to the correct room.

Once I was all set up on the bed, the nurse started to use the ultrasound on my stomach. She made small talk with us while using the machine, asking what our predicted gender was and saying how cute of a couple we were.

I was smiling until I saw the nurse's worried expression, "Is there something wrong?"

"I'm sorry to say I have some bad news," she put down the ultrasound device, "it seems that you've had a miscarriage."

"W-What?" I stuttered, Shawn doing the same.

"I'm so sorry," the nurse said sympathetically before walking out of the room.

*   *   *   *

The time after that felt as if everything was moving in slow motion. Every glimpse of parents with their kid or baby felt like a stab to the heart. I'm not going to be a mom, it played over and over in my head.

The world was a blur as we drove home. Shawn didn't say a word. Didn't hold my hand, open the car door, or barely even look at me.

Even through the haze, I could tell he was tense and upset. His hands gripped tightly on the steering wheel, turning his knuckles white.

When we got home, nothing changed. Shawn simply went inside without me.

Once we were inside, he went straight to our room, slamming the door behind him.

That was when it hit me.

I had never felt so alone and devastated all at the same time as I fell to my knees in front of our closed bedroom door, tears pouring out immediately.

I stayed there, leaning against the door and sobbing for a few minutes.

However, when I stopped I heard something that was somehow almost as heartbreaking as the bad news. I could clearly hear Shawn sobbing on the other side of the door.

It made me cry harder until I shakily spoke, "S-Shawn?"

He opened the door slightly and I saw his red eyes and flushed cheeks through the small opening.

When he saw my face, clearly resembling his own, he crumbled, pulling me into his arms as I soaked his shirt with tears.  He stroked my hair as I tried to slow my breathing.

"I'm so sorry, Shawn," I cried, "What if I did something to our baby? What if this is all my fault."

"Babygirl," Shawn's voice cracked, "This is not your fault. Don't say that. Things. . .Things happen I guess."

"But how are we going to tell everyone? I'm probably going to get accused of things I didn't do. I wanted to be a mom so badly and everyone was so excited. . .Especially you and me!" I sobbed onto his shirt again.

He bit his lip, "I know, I know darling. But not matter what happens we'll get through this together. I promise that you'll never, ever be alone."

"Thank you," I kissed him quickly before laying against his chest.

Shawn rubbed my hand softly, planting kisses on it at times, until we fell asleep in each others arms.

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......Yup I just wrote that........
I wasn't gojng to at first but then I thought it was a really good idea so yeah.
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