reset ; ym

Two hours later

"Screw him, really." Hoseok shook his head as he watched the coffee fill up his paper cup.
"I mean - who the hell throws a picture frame at someone else for no reason and isn't completely nuts?" He huffed. "You made the right decision, my dear friend."
Yoongi crossed his arms and watched him pour milk into his coffee. He knew that Hoseok was only saying that so that Yoongi wasn't feeling too bad.
In that regard he was a really good friend. Or maybe not, because it probably included him fibbing to his friends every now and then.

And Yoongi also knew for a fact that Hoseok had adored his and Jimin's relationship, for whatever reason. He always took pictures of them and was happy to help whenever an anniversary or so was coming up soon.
"You tell me if that isn't maybe something normal that just happens," Yoongi mumbled, "I've never broken up with anyone else before."
Hoseok glanced at Yoongi before taking a sip of his coffee.
"It isn't, I can tell you that much. And I never thought that Jimin was that kinda guy."
Yoongi bit down on his bottom lip. "Well, be glad that you've never experienced him in a fight, then. He's the worst."
Yoongi felt bad for saying that. He shouldn't, but he really did.
Yoongi was probably no better than Jimin. They were just different. Jimin was loud because fights were the only times when he could let go of his usually sweet and calm persona, and Yoongi never thought about what he was saying like he normally did.

"That's why you broke up with him," Hoseok said and took another sip of his coffee.
"I guess." Yoongi contorted his face. "How can you drink that stuff?"
Vending machine coffee was probably one of the most disgusting things to have ever exist.
Hoseok chuckled and shrugged. "It's not that bad, really." Together, they walked down the hallway and stopped in front of the door that lead to the dance studio.
"I can come over to your place after work, if you want," Hoseok suggested and leaned against the door. Yoongi shrugged.
"It's okay, really. If you don't have time then that's fine."
He smiled, but Hoseok just looked at him thoughtfully.

"Will you be okay? I mean... see, I know how much Jimin meant to you and that this is probably not easy for you, so if you wanna talk, then that's fine. Really."
Yoongi bit down on his bottom lip.
"I know. Thank you." He managed a smile.
"And now get to work. The kids are waiting." Yoongi nodded towards the door. Hoseok sighed.
"Yeah, you're probably right... see you then." He smiled and opened the door. And Yoongi was alone.

He had his hands buried in his pockets and his head lowered as he was walking down the road. Being alone right now was really not the best idea. It allowed Yoongi to think again, and before he even knew where his mind was going to he had Jimin's face and Jimin only stuck in his head.
He had looked so scared, so hurt and so mad... but Yoongi couldn't bring himself to feel guilty. The weight that had been lifted off Yoongi's shoulders the moment he had said the words was worth it all.
The past few months had worn him out, being around Jimin had meant pretending to be someone he wasn't, but avoiding him would make him feel bad - and not only him, but Jimin, too.

Yoongi had thought about this a lot, about the break up, and he had even gone as far as searching for tips on the internet for how to break up with your partner and how to break up with your partner but stay friends. Maybe Yoongi should've considered searching for how to break up with your partner and not get almost hit by a picture frame.
Yoongi cared about Jimin, a lot, and yes, he had actually hoped that they could stay friends. After all, that's how they had started out - as friends.
But now, going back to being friends seemed as impossible as a flying pig.

Yoongi opened the door to his house and walked upstairs until he reached his apartment.
When he entered it, everything felt oddly cold. He took off his shoes and jacket with a sigh and made his way over to his couch.
It was alright, he had made the right decision. Things were better of this way, no more crying and yelling at each other, no more sleeping on the couch or avoiding each other for days.
Yoongi smiled slightly. As he'd told Jimin earlier, he had never lied to him and he still loved him, somehow, but it wasn't enough for a relationship anymore, and it wasn't enough to bare with the constant fights they'd been having either.

Yoongi's gaze fell upon the wall right next to his kitchen which was covered with picture frames.
Pictures of his family, of his friends and, of course, of Jimin decorated the white wall.
Yoongi stared them thoughtfully. He should probably remove them, right?
He got up and walked over to the wall, then he took the first picture frame which held a photo of him and Jimin kissing.
Yeah, he'd definitely had to remove that one, things were over now and it would only help him get over Jimin faster if he didn't have to look at pictures of them every time he wanted to enter his kitchen.

Yoongi pressed his lips together, his fingers itched to open the picture frame and take the photo out - then, to his own surprise, he hung the photograph back on the wall.
He took a step back and closed his eyes.

He couldn't do it. Not yet.

"Fuck..." he whispered to himself and ran a hand through his hair.
"Fuck, Park Jimin, you're not supposed to make this hard for me..."
But the truth was, it wasn't Jimin who made this hard for Yoongi, and it wasn't anyone else either besides Yoongi himself.
It was okay, really. Break ups took their time. You didn't just say the words and that was it. It was much more than that.

Hoseok came over that evening. He sighed and threw a doubting glance at Yoongi as they sat on the couch.
"Are you feeling better now?" he asked.
Yoongi shrugged. "I feel relieved, kind of. And guilty." He rubbed his eyes. "I didn't want to hurt Jimin like that."
"What did you expect? Jimin loved you, a lot, of course he'd be mad or upset or whatever," Hoseok said. Yoongi frowned a little.
"Thanks, that's not helping."
"It's the truth," Hoseok said, "But you did the right thing, really. You didn't have any feelings for him anymore -" Yoongi's heart stung a little.
"It was the fairest thing you could've done."
"I know," Yoongi mumbled back tiredly. If this really had been the right decision, then why was he feeling so... lugubrious? It was weird, really, his mind switched between being relieved and thinking about how hurt Jimin had looked like which only made Yoongi feel more guilty.

"Have you told anyone else?" Hoseok asked after a while. Yoongi thought for a moment. He knew what Hoseok was hinting at.
"No," he said truthfully, "only you."
"Do you think things will get awkward?"
Yoongi shrugged. He didn't know. And he didn't want to think about it either.
If their little group of friends broke apart, it would be his fault. He was the one to end things with Jimin.
It was probable that Jimin wouldn't come to meet his friends anymore if Yoongi was there, too, and without Jimin it wouldn't be the same anymore.

"Taehyung probably hates me now," Yoongi mumbled. Hoseok chuckled.
"Taehyung hates everyone who does anything that could potentially hurt Jimin. They're best friends, after all."
Yoongi lifted his head. "Hey, we're best friends as well and you don't hate Namjoon."
Hoseok frowned. "Why would I hate Namjoon?" he asked.
Yoongi's eyes widened slightly.
"Uh, maybe because he once punched me in the face?" he reminded his friend and huffed. "Unbelievable."

Hoseok hesitated, then he laughed. "Namjoon was drunk, he didn't know what he was doing," he said, "Besides, you're different. Jimin just needs to be protected, you're sassy enough to defend yourself."
"Jimin can be sneaky, okay? He knows damn well how to defend himself. This one time, we were -" Yoongi stopped himself. The smile that had formed on his lips disappeared and he lowered his head.
Suddenly, he felt unbelievably bad for being happy. He shouldn't be, really. Besides, talking about memories with Jimin wouldn't help him get over this whole thing either.

When he looked at Hoseok, he saw that his expression had turned serious as well.
"You made the right decision," he repeated. Yoongi swallowed hard. "Yeah," he whispered back.

He hated himself for the uneasy feeling in his stomach. If it had been the right decision, why was it making him feel so uneasy?