DROPPING WALLS (MANXMAN) ~UNDER REVIEW~

The "I ALMOST DIDN'T COME" time

NOW

Thomas S. Fitz was secretly trying to catch a breath because he felt like he was drowning, and he wasn't even inside the water. He was sitting at a restaurant, and in front of him was the only person he ever loved and trusted more than he did love and cared for his grandparents.

Peter Delley was handsome. His hair was cut short and his eyes were shining, they always did shine when the sun was setting. His lips were small and full, his features as peaceful and his black skin was the most beautiful thing in that restaurant.

Thomas would love to say he didn't notice the big muscles the other boy now had, or the tattoos coming out of the polo sleeves. Thomas had seen those online and they were more impressive in real life.

The boy was going to speak first, but he was looking at Peter's hands, those big things were strong and the veins were pulsing.

When he looked back at Peter faces he could tell the boy was also taking everything in before speaking.

"Can I get you, two boys, anything?" Said a waiter and Thomas jumped startled, he had forgotten about the other people around them, and as he was sitting there without ordering for a while it was expected someone would finally come and ask that. Peter was also surprised, but he replied the man:

"I would like a cup of black coffee for me please, and a lemon juice with ice for you?" Asked Peter to Thomas, the boy was surprised he still remembered, he nodded and Peter finished the order.

Thomas was very interested in knowing what had happened to Peter's countryside accent because it vanished.

"I was very happy when I saw your name on the tryouts roster this year." Peter began out of nowhere "we were right, after all, you got invited again. I am very proud and happy, Tom"

Thomas hated how well that comment made him fell, he didn't care when his coach congratulated him, he was numb with no felling when his parents jumped with happiness, but he felt proud and happy just by hearing Peter say those words. "So, I was very surprised when your friend told me you wanted to meet, I thought it was a joke, but why would he do that..." Said the boy.
"He isn't my friend." Said Thomas, speaking for the first time. Peter stared at him, they stared at each other. It had passed two years but they still knew each other.

"Your first words for me in years are those... I don't know if I fell offended or happy, I almost didn't come." Peter said.

"I almost didn't come either." Said Thomas looking out of the window.

He could hear the plates being taken from other tables and bottles being opened, but the loudest thing in that place was the sound of his blood flowing from his heart to his head.

"Then why did you?" The other asked and Thomas closed his eyes to think. Why had he? "Are you worried that I'm going to tell anyone about us? I would implicate me too, so you don't have to worry."

"People kind of said I needed to discuss things with you, so I can move on." Thomas said dryly.

"You've been talking to shrinks... Are they helping...?" Peter asked and Thomas looked at his face.

"I don't with shrinks about anything but soccer."

"Then, who "people" is exactly? One person, your family?" Peter was worried.

"People I trust, you don't have to worry." Peter was defensive and Thomas felt guilty. "Nobody's gonna tell anything."

Peter leaned back, he was thinking. Thomas could see that they were different now, even though lots of things remained, there were two years of information and feelings, and experiences without one another.

"I don't think it's fair of you to out me to people I don't even know." Said, Peter. He was serious, he expressions tense and his smile had disappeared.

"I don't it was fair of you to leave." Said Thomas and Peter just looked at him, Thomas had said what he wanted to say, Peter heard what he didn't want to hear.

"You are the one who stopped talking to me..." Peter whispered. He leaned forward so Thomas could look into his eyes. "I kept trying and you never answered."

"We had broken up." Said Thomas and Peter looked very angry.

"No, we didn't. You gave up on us."

"You told me when you thought I would accept the offer, about everything that goes wrong if we stayed together. You told me about distance, secrets, fame everything... When you left I assumed that's what you thought and that's what was bound to happen." Thomas said nonstop, he kept his voice low, so only they could hear, but he put every single bit of anger in every word.

"Do you really think I would have ignored you forever if you had left? I would have tried! I would call you, text and even meet you, I would keep what we had somehow, but you did not." Peter said very slowly and hurt. It was interesting and scary how a feeling could remain that strong after so many years.

"You stopped." Said Thomas. Peter looked at him confused. "You gave up, you didn't call anymore..." Peter realized what was hurting Thomas the most. The fact that Peter had moved on, or seemed to have.

"I couldn't keep things like that, Tom. Every single day I called your grandparents had a different excuse, your parents were very short with words and even said to my parents that our break up was affecting your performance and that it was my fault, I didn't even think about breaking up until then, that's when I realized you were done with me."

Thomas didn't look anywhere. He could feel the world, and it was terrifying.

"Thomas... You were not the only one in that relationship. You were mad at me and everything..."

"I had a boyfriend and an opportunity, I lost both of them..." Thomas said angrily.

"I lost a boyfriend too." Said Peter sharp. "I went to The House alone, not knowing anyone, the only person I wanted to talk and could talk for real were you and you weren't there." Thomas heard that and got quiet. Peter opened and closed his fists repeatedly and the other boy just observed.

"It's been two years. We didn't talk for this whole time, but I really would like if it could change, we're both soccer players now, we have to move on..." Peter said not looking at Thomas but at the table, the waiter came back with the drinks and none of the boys touched it.

"I am still a tryout."

"I know you, you're the best player I've ever played with. I saw your game yesterday, it was fantastic, you controlled everything that happened, and you were in pain. You will sign with Unity. And if they are stupid and don't sign you all the other teams will want you... Pretty sure offers are being made at this very moment to the team's manager."  Thomas didn't want to think about it. Peter's words and the praise made Thomas proud of himself.

"The team's manager doesn't manage me. I have Isabela Fraim." Thomas said, he was feeling hurt, truth gutted the most when both parts knew about it, he was opening up and vulnerability was Thomas biggest fear, he wasn't comfortable.

"Wow, her company is big... You're good if one of the managers there is taking care of ya'..."

"She is my manager... I have to go." Thomas got up and Peter grabbed his hand.

The moment their bodies touched Thomas felt all the emotions he hat burned years ago, all the times Peter's skin touched his and all the times they went to paradise together. It was Genesis and Apocalypse altogether, it was desire. Thomas freed himself and sat down, he stared at Peter who stared back at him.

"I am not asking to be like before." Peter said. "But when I decided to come here I had in mind that we would be friends after this talk, and I want to make it happen. Let's be friends again, please." Peter took a long sip of his coffee and started to write on a napkin. He passed the piece of paper and got up. Just think about it." Peter left and Thomas says sat, he had to move, he asked for the check. 

"Mr. Delley've paid the bill already." Thomas cursed mentally and left too.