Bulletproof girl scouts

Rebel

Nara's POV

You are summer
I like you babe
But it's my demise
I am ice
And winter feels so warm

Intellectual eyes to search my soul
It's hollow inside but you don't know
You walk on eggshells, afraid to hurt
My dear, I'm broken
What's more you could do?
You can't burn me if I'm already ash

I warn you because
I want you just as much
But I can't

I want you......in me
Kill me, ruin me
I want you
Don't touch me
I want you in my
Head~. (cue high note)
......decide.

(Instrumental)

Feel my pulse
You know 'm dead
So save me now
So wake me
Up~
......inside.

You smile so sweet
My heart is cold
You take my hand
I leave your hold

Curse my heart, for I can't
Love~
......you right.

"So?", I turned my head from the screen to look at RM. His eyes were closed, brows furrowed in concentration. "What do you think?"

He opened his eyes slowly, staring at the monitor. "Can you play it again?", he asked, not looking at me.

"Sure", I clicked replay and he closed his eyes again. I watched his face as I waited, the creases on his forehead disappearing and leaving in place a rather peaceful expression. As if he stopped thinking and decided to just let the music wash over him. I know, because I do it too. This was the second song I made him listen, the first one being 'Rebel'. Rebel was the title track of my mixtape, if I can call it a mixtape because it has less rap and more ballads. Like the one I was playing right now, 'Haven', a hidden track, starts with rap and gradually morphs into a tear inducing ballad. The vocal half has a lot of high notes and hitting them was an achievement of a lifetime because I sing worse than a frog. My voice is originally a lot deeper than other girls (Jieun says it's husky) and it also breaks a lot. Guess I was born to be a rapper.

   The song ends and RM opens his eyes. I wait till he speaks.

"It's the EDM", he says in a low voice, almost a whisper.

"Yes?", I say in english and he straightens his back, taking a deep breath and pulling back the headphones.

"May I?", he reaches for the mouse and I let him, scooting back in my chair. He closes the player and opens the remix file, bringing it to the hook. He plays it once, nods to himself and replays the whole thing. He takes off the headphones and puts them on me, clicking play. "This part", he points on the screen with his index finger when it reaches the hook. I close my eyes and concentrate on the beats. "Do you see that?", he asks when the song ends and I pull back the headphones. He walks up behind me and puts his hands on either side of my chair.

"Right here", he points at the screen again, leaning over me. "This is where it itches, right? Where it goes wrong"

"....yeah", I agree a little slowly, narrowing my eyes at the screen.

"You don't like this part because of the upbeat vibes. Even without lyrics, it is off-putting to your sentiments. It clashes, not able to blend in....", his eyes danced between me and the song arrangement on the screen, using hand gestures and patting my shoulder so I understood, ".....like a curse word in a serenade. The audience may like it but it's not what you want. What you want is to keep the vibe. Which may sound selfish because it's supposed to be a remix, but that's not it", he paused and continued when I nodded for him to go on, "So. It's not selfish because you're not doubting your skills right now. You're doubting the medium. Let me explain. The original song creates a certain mood. The second one takes it to the next level but the remix just sort of dulls the experience. You don't want that. What you want is for it to stay true to its element. Am I right?"