Tree Bros Oneshots For Forever!

Gay or European?

A/N Based off the song 'There! Right There!' from Legally Blonde. Listen to it first.

Evan entered the coffee shop, and stood at the end of the line, which was against the other wall. At the rate the line was going, he knew he was going to be here for a little while. Or maybe a long while. He leaned against the wall, and pulled out his phone.

After about 5 minutes, someone tapped him on the shoulder. Evan turned around and saw Jared standing behind him. "Hey dude, sorry but I've been wondering for a while now, and I need someone else's opinion. You're gay right?"

Evan sighed. They had been over this many times. "Jared...I'm actually bi, not fully gay but..."

"Eh, same difference. Do you think that cashier is gay?"

Evan looked past the line at the cashier, who was handing someone a coffee. He was absolutely beautiful, long dark hair, and dark eyes. Evan couldn't stop staring until Jared got his attention again.

"He's in killer shape, and that tanned skin...he's probably gay." Jared said bit Evan shook his head. He didn't want to believe he was gay, it would just be another person who was to good for him. "And that chin..."

Evan took another glance at he boy.

"It's like an elephant in the room, dude, and it's killing me. So many shades of gray..." Jared laughed, and line moved up.

"I mean, um, just because he has tan skin, doesn't mean he's gay...maybe he just likes to-to tan?"

"Evan, it's the middle of winter," Jared motioned to the window, where the snow was sticking to the sidewalk outside. "And look at his hair. He totally styles it. Gay."

"Well, he could also be...um...um European," Evan pointed out, and Jared crossed his arms, raising an eyebrow.

"They um  bring up their their kids differently over their, Jared. They play p-peculiar sports in those...really tiny shorts..."

"Well that shirt he's wearing right now is very small, if I must say. He's totally gay! He so stylish and relaxed."

"Eh, I don't know...they let their kids wear um kilts in Europe you know."

"There! Right there!" Jared pointed at the boy. "Did you see that look he just gave that last guy? He's gay." The line moved again. They were two people away.

"Yes, but people in...in France, they kiss each other on the cheek all the time," Evan was trying anything to not make the guy gay. "And he...has no accent."

"Maybe he dropped it when he moved here," Jared said and the line moved up again. "Do you smell his cologne? That's a very gay scent. Do you think his chest is waxed?"

"You know what? Fine I have...I have an idea," Evan moved up. It was his turn.

"The floor is yours," Jared gestured to the cash register.

"Hey," said the boy, looking at Evan Evan read the name tag. Connor.

"Connor, that's...that's a...nice name, um got a boyfriend?"

"Well, no, not exactly..." Connor started and Evan turned to look at Jared, but Connor wasn't finished.

"...we just broke up a few days ago and I'm still trying to get over it. What's your order?" Jared looked like he was going to explode, and before Evan could give him his order, Jared interrupted.

"Yeah, he would like one date with you," Jared said, and Evan blushed.

"Sure, I could...I mean...my shift is almost over. Like 5 more minutes," Connor looked at the clock. "Anything else?"

Evan shook his head. "Nope, my work here is done," Jared said and walked out the door, screaming "He's gay, he's gay! He's totally gay!"

A/N I used the lyrics, but the storyline is different, sorry.

Also sorry if it sucked. It's shitty I know.
Also this will be my last oneshot before the new year so happy 2018 guys!