For the greatest person on earth, heather_weasley love ya <3
TW: suicide attempts
The bark on the oak tree was so rough against Evan's hands, he almost cut himself trying to sit on the branch. Thank god he'd become sort of an expert with climbing trees, especially this specific one, since it sat in his backyard and he practically sat on it everyday. Whether it be late in the afternoon or early morning before sunrise, trees always gave him a sense of protection whenever he needed it. And it's not like the tree could refuse, so it was always there to comfort him in times of pain and sorrow. And there had been a lot of times of pain and sorrow throughout the young boy's life.
Now, as Evan sat under the warm colored leaves, he thought about his life, something he'd always dreaded thinking about. He'd never been proud of how his life went, or how he knew life was going to go. His mother had always told him to put himself out there more, because the more he did the better he'd be at surviving in the world. And of course he tried, and he got that job as the apprentice ranger at the State Park, but was that enough?
Now he didn't know.
And now that it was finally senior year, he'd have to make the biggest decision he's ever made; he'd have to decide what to do with himself. He'd have to find a way to make money, to eat, to live. And if he couldn't, then he'd end up living back his mom and relying on her. And he didn't want to be more pathetic than he already was.
He closed his eyes and breathed in the crisp autumn air, trying to push those thoughts away and think about something else.
The first thing that came to mind was Connor Murphy.
Evan didn't know how he felt about the mysterious boy that walked through the hallways with an intimidating stance. Almost everyone in their high school was scared of the boy with the messenger bag, except Evan. Connor never ever gave Evan dirty looks, like he did with other people. His eyes always softened when the blonde boy came into his field of view, and sometimes even his lip would curl into an almost nonexistent smirk.
And for some reason, Evan wanted to melt when he saw that smirk. He wanted to melt just thinking about it.
But he couldn't think about it. He couldn't be in love with Connor Murphy, the infamous depressed weed-smoker.
He tried to shake those thoughts from his mind too, but the thoughts about the future just came back. Evan felt his anxiety levels rise drastically, and the world became a blur below him. He looked down where the grass lay below him.
It looked like it was far enough for him to break a bone if he fell. But if he fell from a higher branch...
Evan grabbed a thick branch about him and hoisted himself up higher and higher, until the setting sun shone on his face through the falling leaves. He looked down again. If he fell now, he was sure he wouldn't make it.
But what would it matter? He was practically invisible anyway. No one would care if he's just disappear now, or later, or whenever.
He balanced himself on one foot, hovering the other one out over the ground, as if he were to step off.
No one cared. So why should he?
The blonde boy was about to step off when he noticed a red leaf that fell from the tree froze in midair. Evan scrunched his eyebrows in confusion. He then noticed that the crisp wind had stopped, and all around him everything seemed frozen in place. Except for him.
🔹🔶🔹
As Connor strolled through the small park in the middle of town, he couldn't help but crack a small smile. He shook the container filled to the brim with pills he had in his pocket. Stolen from the medicine cabinet before he left, unnoticed.
Today was the day, he could feel it.
Of course, he had tried so many times before, it seemed like a normal thing now. But he knew today it would work. The universe was on his side for once.
His mom had thought nothing of it when Connor told her he was was going out for a while. Cynthia has practically given up to the point where she didn't care anymore. She'd tried everything to help her son, but none of it was enough.
It seemed like his whole family had given up.
Connor's dad was the first. Larry stopped caring a long time ago, it was almost as if he knew Connor wouldn't make it past high school. And he didn't care. His sister never cared in the first place, but then again that's what siblings were for.
In some part of his brain, Connor felt like half of the blame could be put on his family. Maybe if they had tried a little more, Connor wouldn't be doing what he was going to do that night.
His plan was to wait until the park had closed. He didn't know why he decided to come so early, but it felt like a good place to make some last minute memories.
As he walked through the trees, he couldn't help but think about Evan. If he were here right then, Evan would be talking non-stop about photosynthesis and shit Connor would never have cared about. But Evan made him want to care.
Connor had never felt that way about someone before. And he didn't now how to feel about it.
He liked Evan. A lot. So much, he didn't know how to handle it. But Evan never showed the same feelings back to him. Maybe Evan wasn't gay? Or maybe he was just scared of him, like everyone else was.
Connor found an empty park bench to sit on, thoughts about Evan still on his mind. An open field sat before him that was framed with trees decorated with leaves of red and yellow. Couples sat with picnics and Connor felt a pang of jealousy run through him. He'd always wanted to be a part of something like that with someone, Evan specifically. But he knew he'd never be able to. His life was never supposed to go that way, he knew that for sure.
Soon the sun was setting low in the sky, and little by little, people left, until it was just him and a woman walking her dog around the path.
A leaf fell next to Connor on the bench and he picked the red and yellow foliage, twirling it in his fingers. He couldn't help but smile at it. It was like saying his last good-bye to the one person he loved in this world. And it felt right to leave.
But out of the corner of his eye, he noticed the woman and the dog freeze mid-step, and Connor turned to notice that neither seemed to be moving. The first thing that came to mind was mass hysteria, but then he realized that the wind had stopped abruptly as well, and the cars on the street were completely still.
Maybe today wasn't the day for him to go.
Part II will be out later today, because it was more than 3000 words so I decided to split it. So stay tuned.
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Tree Bros Oneshots For Forever!
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