Requested by Horses1104
Evan leaned against the wall of the boy's bathroom, slowly sinking to the ground in a fit of uncontrollable tears. He hated himself, there was no other explanation for why he was like this. He hated how he looked, how he acted, how he dressed. But he had no other choice. If he did anything differently, people would find out. And then he'd be in real deep shit.
It hurt to think like that. He loved Wes more than anything in the world. And Wes loved him more than that.
Or at least, that's what he told Evan.
And of course, Evan always smiled and pecked his lips sweetly in reply, but deep down he didn't believe him. If he loved someone that much, why would he hit him? Why would he give him lasting memories of hate and disappointment? And why did Evan choose to stay with someone who hurt him in unimaginable ways?
"Because I'm a stupid fuck, that's why!" Even cried out as soft as he could, although it still came out pretty loud. His eyes widened, if anyone heard him this wouldn't end well. He wrapped his arms around his stomach to calm himself, trying to be careful of the big, purple and yellow bruise that spread from his hip to the small of his back.
He'd gotten that one for not meeting Wes in the parking lot directly after school a few weeks ago. It wasn't his fault, he had stayed after class to talk to a teacher about homework. But he had also left his boyfriend in the middle of the lot "looking like a fucking idiot". That's what Wes had said before he'd kneed Evan in the stomach so hard, Evan thought he'd dislocated something.
From that moment on, it hurt to eat, to sleep, just to basically do any normal human function. But Wes said it was okay, because now Evan had learned his lesson, and he wouldn't do it again.
And he didn't. Or, he didn't leave Wes waiting in the parking lot anymore.
But every time he canceled a date because his mom wanted to spend time with him, or every time Jared said some sort of offensive joke in front of Wes, Evan took the blame in the form of a punch to his face.
Another bruise, another lie to his mom, his friends, himself.
He wanted so badly to leave this shitty town and never look back, to get away from all of the pain and hurt and go start over. All he wanted was to grab some cash and a backpack with all the essentials and just go.
But he knew if he did, Wes would find him, and he'd be in a worse position than he already was.
Evan felt pathetic as he sat on the floor of the bathroom, wiping the tears that just kept coming like an erupted volcano. He needed to pull himself together. It wasn't as bad as he thought it was. Wes loved him, all Wes wanted was for him to be a better person. Right?
The creaking sound of the bathroom door opening drowned out Evan's sobs, and he watched in horror as a boy slid through the opening. It was Connor Murphy.
Shit.
It was only after shutting the door behind him did Connor see the boy curled up in a ball on the floor. "What the fuck, dude?" He spat, his long dark locks swinging as he tilted his head to the side.
"Nothing, I was just...nothing, never mind," Evan slowly stood up on his shaky legs, being careful about the bruises.
"Okay," Connor shrugged, and pulled out a joint and a lighter. Evan stared at him in horror. "You want one?"
The blonde shook his head vigorously. "Uh...no, thanks."
"Suit yourself," Connor stuck the joint in between his teeth, and the smell of weed filled the room in a matter of seconds. "You're missing out though," smoke poured out of his mouth. "Were you planning on telling me why you're on the floor? And in the middle of a mental breakdown?"
"N-No, not really," he muttered when he felt a stab of pain shoot up his arm and down his chest. "Ow, shit."
"Woah, dude you okay?" The boy dropped his messenger bag to the floor before he attempted to move to help Evan, who was obviously in pain.
The blonde boy pushed him away. "No, I'm fine. I just...I got into a fight the other day and..."
"A fight?" Connor scoffed, holding his joint in between two fingers. "You don't look like one to get into fights."
"It was a small fight," Evan frowned. "It was stupid, it only lasted for a few m-moments. The other person, he didn't get hurt. I don't like...I don't like hurting people."
Connor frowned, his concern growing by the second. "Yeah, I can tell."
"I don't even know why h-he hit me, I mean...I didn't even do anything wrong," Evan felt more tears forming in his eyes as he rambled. "I mean, I forgot to turn off one light and Wes just..."
"Wait, Wes? Football player Wes?"
"Y-Yeah," Evan felt a single tear trail down his cheek. "He's my...he's my boyfriend."
Connor frowned. "How many times has he hit you?"
"Not a lot I swear, it's only a few times. When he thinks I....d-deserve it," Evan shuffled his feet uncomfortably, wiping the tears from his cheeks. "It doesn't hurt."
"But it sounds like it does though," Connor reached out slowly to touch Evan's shoulder comfortingly, but the blonde boy flinched away.
"Please, please don't touch me...I'm sorry..."
Connor backed away slowly. "Why are you apologizing?"
"Because I'm always the one doing something wrong," the blonde's bottom lip trembled as he tried to hold back his tears.
"You're not doing anything wrong," Connor frowned. "You're perfect."
"No I'm not, I'm stupid and ugly and I...."
Evan was going to continue but was shut up when a hand connected with his, interlocking their fingers.
"You're perfect. And smart, and beautiful. You just made a bad choice."
The blonde shook his head, letting the tears fall down his face. "No, no I can't do this, I have a boyfriend," he sobbed, except he didn't let go of Connor's hand. He didn't want to let go.
"No you don't. He's not you're boyfriend," Connor put out his lit joint on the wall. "He shouldn't be hurting you like this. That's abuse."
"I...I can't leave him though," Evan sank down to the tiled floor. "If I break up with him, he'll do something worse."
"Then we'll figure that out later," Connor sat down next to him.
Evan didn't move, just kept holding his hand as the tears streamed down his face. "Thank you."
Hahahaha I hate myself.
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Tree Bros Oneshots For Forever!
FanfictionBecause who doesn't love a good gay oneshot? Tree Bros from Dear Evan Hansen (Evan x Connor) Highest Ranking: 1 in #deh #connor #benplatt #jaredkleinman #alanabeck #tree #bros #evanhansen #treebros *Art on the cover is most definitely not made by me...