The Only Reason- 5SOS Little Sister

Chapter 13

Today was the day. My parents funeral. We just hung out the last couple of days, during which I had been mentally preparing myself.

In the morning, I woke up and showered. I put on my black dress. It had short sleeves and had dark purple flowers all over it. I put my hair up in a pony tail and knew mascara would be a mistake, that I would just cry it all off. I sat in the living room and waited for all the boys to finish showering. Ashton was the first one ready, he came out and sat with me on the couch, wrapping his arm around my shoulder. We didn't talk.

We decided to forgo a ceremony. I knew it was selfish,but being back in my hometown was causing me to struggle more than ever, and I didn't want to stay a second longer than was necessary. It brought back memories of the accident, of my happy childhood, the fact I would never get to hug my mom again. The cemetery was out in the middle of nowhere, it was peaceful. It was grey out, the sky dark with an incoming storm. We pulled into the little gravel road that circled around the cemetery. We parked and got out. There was two guys there for the burial. One was a priest, the other a grave digger. My parents were in the casket together. As we walked up, Mikey grabbed my hand. We walked up and the priest greeted up. He spoke a beautiful passage of life and love.

I bit my lip because it had started to wobble. They started to lower my parents into the ground. This was it, I would never see them again. A high-pitched exhale slipped out from deep in my chest and I covered my mouth with my hand. Mikey pulled my into his chest and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't look away from the casket that was lowering into the ground. I was trying to be stoic, letting tears drip. Mikey was crying almost as hard as I was. Ashton out his hand on Michael's shoulder, and I felt Calum's hand on mine. Luke stood next to Michael, hand on his back.

I tried to take deep breaths, but they came out shallow. I moved out of Michael's heavy grip, I was starting to feel overwhelmed with everyone standing so close to me. Luke handed me a few from the bouquets we brought too, my vision blurry. The priest told us that we could put the flowers on the top of the casket if we wanted. I walked to the edge of the hole, squeezing the stem in my hand.

"Hi Mommy. Hi Daddy. I'm sad that that you had to leave us so soon, but life that happens." I dropped a white rose on the top of the casket. It was a stark difference between the black dirt, the brown casket. The flower looked too pretty, incredibly unnatural

"Daddy guess what? This is my new family. They take really good care of me, I promise. Don't you worry Daddy. And Mommy. I met a boy named EJ. He works at a bookstore, so you can see why I like him so much. He's my bestfriend and he takes good care of me too. I love you guys so much. I miss living here. I miss you a-..." I couldn't continue, the lump in my throat started becoming painful.

Mikey pulled me into his chest. It was his turn to talk to them.

"Hey Mum and Dad. Sorry that I haven't been around the past couple years. I really am regretting that now. The thing is, the best thing out of this horrible situation is that I have Brookie. I guess... What I'm trying to say is even though I wasn't really around, I love you more than you probably think I do. I won't let anything happen to your little girl Dad. I promise. The boys promise too." He said softly.

We finished covering the casket in the flowers and it started to sprinkle. The priest left, and the gravedigger started moving dirt back into the hole. The boys didn't say anything and just let me stand there looking at the grave. After about 20 minutes of just standing with the boys, I pulled out my phone and took a picture of the grave. I had Ash take a picture of me and Miky by the grave too. We didn't smile.

"I need a second." I whispered to Michael. He squeezed my shoulder and they all went into the car. I stayed out in the cold rain. I just looked at the grave. I let my face crumple, and a cry of anguish sounded from my chest as I lowered to my knees, my hands clutching my aching heart. My wail of sorrow was drowned out by the rain. My nails dug into my chest as my chin dropped to my chest, rain and tears running off the tip of my nose, I watched the water drip onto the ground in front of the new hole my parents now occupied.

I took a deep breath and dug my hands into the wet ground as I whispered one last, "I love you." I shut my eyes and inhaled, slowly stood, and walked to the car. Calum squeezed himself into the middle seat as I opened and shut the car door behind me. I stared out the window, feeling four pairs of eyes watching me in silence. I felt Calum's hand lay on my soaking wet, dirt covered knee.

We drove back to the hotel in silence. Nobody said I word. I guess it was because none of us had anything to say.