If I Could Tell Him

Chapter thirty-eight

CONNOR POV

ONE YEAR LATER TIME SKIP BROUGHT TO YOU BY WILL CONNOLLY AND LAURA DREYFUSS' FRIENDSHIP

Connor woke up spooning Evan from behind, his face buried in the fabric of the back of his shirt, breathing in the comforting scent of him. He felt Evan shiver under the covers and subconsciously snuggle closer to Connor, who had no objections whatsoever.

"Good morning." Came the tired voice of Evan, yawning. He tried to sit up, but Connor reached up and pulled him tighter into his chest.

"Good morning, beautiful." Connor responded, smiling against Evan's neck. He planted a kiss there and nuzzled the back of his neck. Evan laughed quietly.

"Someone's in a good mood this morning." Evan observed, turning in Connors arms to face him.

"Goddamn.." Connor whispered, still not used to seeing Evan's flawless face every morning. Holy shit..Connor thought to himself. How the hell did I land him? This was a question Connor asked himself often.

"What? Did I do something wrong?" Evan asked. Connor could tell he was self conscious.

"You drive me crazy, Hansen..." Connor murmured gently, causing his husband to blush and cuddle closer to him. Connor kissed Evan gently on the lips, which made Evan turn an even deeper shade of pink.

"I'm never gonna get used to that." Evan admitted.

"Used to what?" Connor asked, feigning innocence. He winked teasingly.

"Y-you kissing me..." Evan trailed off.

"Wow! A stutter? I make you that nervous?" Connor asked, giggling. He kissed all over Evan's face, from the top of his head to the underside of his jaw. Evan nodded, shivering at Connor's touch. "You're adorable." He continued.

"No, you are." Evan said immediately.

"I love you." Connor said suddenly. He pulled Evan into a tight embrace, pressing his heart against his husbands'. "I love you, I love you, I love you.." he repeated.

"I love you too, baby..." Evan whispered back. He yawned tiredly, making a tiny, adorable squeak as he did.

"I'll get you some coffee." Connor said, rolling out of bed, out of the warmth and security of Evan's arms. Standing, he put his hair in a casual low ponytail with one of the hair ties around his wrist. Then he stretched, yawned, and headed towards the bedroom door, turning and blowing Evan a kiss before grinning and walking out.

As he walked down the stairs, he heard commotion coming from the kitchen. He walked in, prepared to protect his family if need be. He turned the corner and saw his daughter sitting on the counter, surrounded by flour.

"Marigold Hazel Hansen!" Connor said sternly, using her full name. She turned her head immediately with that look of guilt that only kids who knew they were in trouble could manage.

"I was making cookies for you and daddy!" She said quickly, pointing her tiny finger at a bowl full of water and flour. Connor's stern expression melted into a gentler one.

"Thank you, darling." He said, smiling at her. Connor scooped her up and rinsed the flour off of her hands. "Taste testing them too?" He asked, wiping some flour off her face with a damp rag.

"I had to make sure they weren't posiness." Marigold said importantly. Connor laughed.

"Yes. Posiness." He agreed. "Can you help me clean this up? I'm going to make some coffee for dad."

"Yes!" Squealed Marigold, doing her best to help him wipe up the flour. Connor made some coffee and put it in a cup with a heat resistant case.

"Can you bring this to him?" He asked, handing the cup to his daughter. She nodded, smiling and took the cup, carefully walking up the stairs. Connor cleaned the kitchen, humming to himself. Hearing someone come down the stairs, Connor turned and smiled at the sight of Evan in one of Connor's old hoodies from high school and flannel pajama pants, carrying Marigold in one arm and the coffee in his other hand.

"Thanks for the coffee, love." Evan said, kissing Connor on the forehead.

"No problem." He responded. Evan placed Marigold on a chair, glancing at Connor.

"Honey...your father and I have got enough money to get you involved in an extracurricular activity. Anything you want." Evan said, smiling and putting a hand on Connor's shoulder.

"Anything I want?" She asked in wonder. "Like dancing? Or karate? Or soccer?"

Connor looked up and Evan and smiled, nodding. "Anything you want." Evan confirmed. "After all, you're almost five years old!"

"I want to dance!" Marigold squealed. "I want to be a ballerina!" She stood up and twirled around, giggling.

"A ballerina it is." Connor said, standing up and spun her around. He smiled widely at Evan.

"We did it." Evan said, taking Connor's hand in his and Marigold's in his other. "We're a real family. This is a step. A step towards being a real family."

"We are a real family." Connor said, confused. "We're legally married and we have a daughter."

"Yeah..I know..it's just hitting me now though. I don't know." Evan stated. "Does that make sense?"

"Oh. Yeah. I understand now." Connor confirmed, kissing him on the forehead. "A real family." He repeated.

"Real family!" Marigold cheered.