Please Understand Why

Deadly Eyes

Use me

Torture me

Take me

But God knows I'm so done with you.

You and your treacherous tongue and deadly eyes.

              The first few days were horrible. I've cried so much I thought I was losing my mind. Least start out with the fact I couldn't leave the classroom without my heart pounding and handshaking to the point where when I made it to the next class, I was in tears. Now the class itself is fine. I guess I got all the class I wanted, but there's one girl that I just can't stand and she's always clinging to me. And, it's not like I can say I'm in a relationship but, we'll get to that later. She's always around me and has the "I'm better than you" vibes and trait. So, it doesn't work well for me.

               The past few days have been challenging as well because I met up with Chance at least two days in a row, just to pinky promise stuff. Which means I had to look him in his eyes, touch his hand and promise. I promise that if he ever becomes a problem in any of my relationships to let him know. (Even though he would never be an issue because I wouldn't let it happen.) But, I also promised to stay clean after a long and agreement back and forth. Last year he promised all by himself, he would never leave. I believed him, I mean I could see the truth in his eyes. But one night, he found out about me and Brooke, and he said he was leaving. I started crying and freaking out. I didn't want him to leave at least not right now when we are working so hard and getting to be really good friends finally. I begged him to stay. Then the next day when I promise to tell him anything. But I was so upset, with the night before conversation, I looked at him as said

"I will tell you, but you can't leave, you promised me. You looked me in the eyes and promised."

              It was a lot that day. I was making sure Brooke was okay, then I had to go and meet up with him. Also, you're probably curious who Brooke is. She is the ex-girlfriend I spoke about. But know we're trying to become a thing again. It's really confusing. Because we are not together but we are. So, I'm kind of single-taken. But I really want us to work out because I really care and like her. Which is really scary at the same time. Last time I was in a relationship with a girl, I have also dated another girl beside her. I've learned from that and I wouldn't date anyone else now. She's is truly amazing. No matter what others have to say. The only thing is Brooke and Chance can't stand each other, so that can be tricky on my end. Considering my placement with both of them. Of course, I don't share their secrets with the other, but I do know that it could get me in trouble. But I've noticed that all of my exes have one thing in common, and it's their eyes. All of their eyes are so beautiful!

             But, as for me, I'm okay-ish. I could be better but I'm not dead so I would say I'm good. The only problem besides the hallways is that I've been getting really dizzy out of nowhere. So dizzy to the point I will fall down. I had to stay home one day because I was so dizzy. Later that day I was walking up the stairs and got hit with a large wave of dizziness so I fell down the stairs, on to the concrete ground. Thankfully I only hurt my hip, but I was happy I didn't go to the school that day. I have no clue why this happening but I would really enjoy if it would stop.

    All those its all my fears and tears through the week. I know it's going to be a tough year. Because out there is a treacherous tongue with deadly eyes, with a bullet-pointed at me.

The Deadly Eyes,

Unknown