"Hey! See that guy?" Michael points out a white haired man walking towards them, "He's just turned thirty, that's what you're going to look like in a couple of days CalPal!"
"Stop it!" Giggles Corey as Michael puts his arm around Calum's shoulders in an effort to comfort him.
"A strange thing happens when you're thirty..." Continues Michael, undaunted. "You look okay when you go to bed but then you wake up the next day and your ass is down to there..." He points at the floor, "And your dick disappears!"
"I'm thirty three, what does that make me?!" Sam asks, not wanting to know the answer.
"Did you guys just hear something?" Michael asks looking up at the sky as he removes his jacket before entering the Diner, "A voice from the dead?"
Sam slaps him on the bum as Corey holds the door open for all of them.
"I'm glad I didn't move in with Stephen then, judging on how much time I have left!"
"Perhaps you were lured by the thought of all that chiropractic sex?" Suggests Sam.
"The sex wasn't that great,"
"I seem to remember something about a talented tongue?" Corey teases, sitting down next to Calum in a booth.
"And fantastic fingers?" Sam joins in, wiggling his fingers.
"Orgasms that wouldn't stop?" Murmurs Corey in Calum's ear, making him squirm.
"Alright! The sex was great! It just gets boring you know, with the same person after a while?"
"Well, I wouldn't know," Michael boasts.
Calum rolls his eyes and ignores him. "Well, now I'm ready to do all those things you can't do with a boyfriend, like go to clubs, go out dancing..."
"Go home alone..." Sam points out, bringing Calum back to reality with a bump.
"Hey! Waiter!" Michael calls over to the other side of the room where Luke is serving customers. He turns and sticks his middle finger up to Michael making the others laugh.
"Do you think we could get some water?" Michael asks, ignoring his gesture.
"What is he doing here?" Calum asks Joy as she comes up to their table, her pad already out to take their order.
"Isn't he adorable?" She giggles as Luke walks past behind her. "The customers love him. His ass gets more compliments than the burgers!"
"That because his buns are fresh," Quips Sam, getting a slap on the arm with Joy's notepad.
Michael half listens to the conversation as he tracks Luke's progress around the diner, clocking exactly how many of the other diners flirt with and watch him but even he scowls when Luke arrives back with four glasses of already poured water, his fingers stuck in each one as he plonks them down on the table to a chorus of 'Ew's!' from the others. Corey even goes so far as to slap his hand away from his glass.
"Jesus! You live in my room at my mother's house, you work where I eat, I can't get rid of you can I?" Calum complains.
"Blame him!" Luke retorts, nodding his head towards Michael. "He's the one making me do this!" He flicks the water off his fingers in Michael's direction.
"He's just paying off the charges he made to my credit card," Michael very calmly explains to the three pairs of enquiring eyes looking in his direction.
"Couldn't you send him to prison?" Calum asks.
"This is worse," Joy assures them all, her hands on her hips. "Where's Stephen?"
YOU ARE READING
Queer as Muke
Fanfic"The thing you need to know is, it's all about sex. It's true. In fact they say men think about sex every twenty-eight seconds. Of course that's straight men. With gay men it's every nine." Twenty nine year old advertising executive Michael Cliffor...
