Learning to trust: My journal

In His Hands

 October 9, 2018

 Hi all! Thanksgiving weekend is over and it's back to school, but a short week of school! only three days of school this week! YAY! 

 This weekend I had a bit of a scary thing happen to me, I slammed my finger into our outside door and cut my finger really bad. I had to get four stitches and I had never gotten stitches before. On the way to the hospital I had a full blown anxiety attack. My dad just thought that I was crying from the pain, but I was really just panicking about my finger. I first started to cry uncontrollably at home when we were running my finger under water in the bathroom. After a while I started to feel a little bit calmer but then I noticed I was starting to shiver inside and shake. once we got to the hospital and were walking inside to the ER, I was shivering uncontrollably. I had to clench my jaw to keep from chattering my teeth. while in the ER, I tried to keep myself distracted while I waited for the doctor get my stitches in. The way I distracted myself was texting my LDP leader. I knew she would have some encouraging words to say. So I texted her and she told me I would be ok and that the doctors would take good care of me. This was just what I needed to hear. I needed to be reminded that there were people here to help me and make sure I was ok. 

 This situation gave me the opportunity to trust that God knew what he was doing. He had me in his hands and that he had it all under control even though it was out of my control. I also took this time to remember that I needed to thank God for everything even though I was in a pretty crappy situation. So I sat there in the ER, thanking God for helping me get through this and giving me peace after my anxiety attack. I thanked him that he allowed me to have very caring doctor's who knew just what I needed and what to do. I thanked God fir my dad being so calm through this all. I realized I actually had a lot to be thankful for even though I was in pain and bleeding like crazy. 

 This was not the most fun situation but it did help me learn to focus on the good instead of the bad. It helped me remember that God has me in his hands and that all I have to do is trust and let him do his thing. It's not easy but it's simple.😉

 -Emmers