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Review by Painite: All I See

Title: All I See

Author: Havingfun_ISKEY

Reviewer: awesomeSTG

Summary/Blurb: 3/5

Because you stated this this fan fiction doesn't need any prior knowledge, you can state in the blurb that this is an open fanfic. I've read other stories like that, and it really helped them garner more readers who aren't into the fandom! 

I noticed that your summary is pretty long already. It's really great, though, but I think you were telling the readers about it a little too much and, in the end, they might back out because they're bored or that they've already seen too much. I suggest hat you cut if off at certain parts, mostly like the third, but that's pretty relevant as well... So I'm pretty much conflicted on where you should cut some parts off. I suggest keeping the summary in a normal length. You can decide what to do from here, since it's your book after all.

Description: 4/5

Whoa, such power! I don't know what else to say because I'm tongue-tied with awe. You're a real undiscovered gem! I love the way you weave your words and control them under your own volition - it really left me dumbstruck, haha. Though there's still the minor issue of the chapter lengths and selective reading, I wasn't really bothered because my mind was so immersed in the depths of imagination. The confusion Nate felt - I felt it too! I didn't even realise that I reached the end.

Grammar: 5/5 

I'm really honoured that I got the chance to review such an amazing story, and even though I just started reading, the feelings were present, the diction, and the grammar was on-point! I'm not really meticulous on grammar and all that stuff unless it gets in the way of my understanding, so I congratulate you! Lovely, frightening, and awesome story!

Characterization: 5/5 

Nate's a really well-rounded character, and I love him for that! He's completely realistic and human, with flaws and imperfections. There's this thought inside of me telling me that he represents a certain trait in all of us humans about our desires for fame and fortune. I really loved it, and I'm sure he'll develop more as the story proceeds. 

Plot: 5/5 

The plot is amazing, complex, and I just know that you worked really hard just to make this concrete and so wonderfully relevant. This part is short, mainly because your book is still new, but expect me to continue reading!!

Realism: 5/5

To be honest, this is the first time I've read a CONCRETE story about drugs, deception, hardships. Most cliché stories just romanticize the entire thing, and it's clear that they didn't do their research, for they keep on taking these things lightly. I'm really amazed on how you managed to pull this off! 

When Nate was under the effects of the drug, you made it in such a way that my mind also became cloudy and confused, and I was questioning whether that scene was real or just an effect of the haze on him. You dragged me into the world of truth, and I realized even more that these things could not be taken lightly. 

OVERALL SCORE: 27/30

Hello, thank you so much for choosing me, and I'm terribly sorry for the delay. I just started reading only a few days ago because I was extremely busy, but this story was a real eye-opener for me. Achieving fame is tougher than it looks, and there's always a price for the things you usually take for granted. 

I usually read light novels and fantasy stories—because my young mind can't handle a lot of dark things just yet—but I really loved the way you structured this, and I'm glad I got the chance to read this. Keep on writing, diamond in the rough!