What have you done, my Disco?

44.

Too tired from my photography class. Yes, pumapasok na ulit ako. Kakaenroll ko lang 3 days ago kaya naman medyo naghihinay hinay muna ako sa career ko dahil gusto ko din makapagpahinga ako. Thank goodness that they (my fans) really understand me.

Ang daming edits for today, jusko nakakapagod at 1:30 am na ako nakauwi! Mabuti nalang din at nasa legal age na ako kahit maabutan ako ng curfew eh ayos lang (para sakin pero hindi okay kay Ter yon hahahaha). So dumeretso na ako sa bahay.

I tried to sneak out at first but then nung makita kong bukas yung smart tv namin, naglakad na ako nang normal. I saw Blaster on the sofa. "Hey. What took you so long para makauwi ng ganitong oras?" he paused the movie. Ganitong oras nanonood siya ng live concert ng P!ATD sa YouTube? "Shempre never naman nawalan ng traffic sa Pinas." as I rolled my eyes at sumalamak ng upo sa tabi niya sa sobrang pagod at stress.

As I know hindi naman talaga marunong or nakahiligan ni Blaster na manood ng mga ganyan. Hindi ko alam pero siguro baka nililibang niya lang sarili niya para makalimot sa mga nangyari kahapon diba?

“Sorry Blaster, pero natauhan lang ako. ”

Masakit nga naman talaga yon. Shit argh. That is so stupid! Damn, Unique! Isa kang malaking tanga para sabihin sa kapatid ko yung ganon hays. Parang gago lang eh di man lang ipaglaban si Blaster! Kumbaga parang pandalian lang na exposure parang sa SPS nung Linggo ay-- joke lang po hahahahahahahahahahaha!

"Para kang tanga! Nanonood ka pa niyan eh nandyan din naman kayo sa Wicked Tour nila hahaha."

"Wala. Pinapanood lang namin yung mga part at performance namin. Kung maayos ba o hindi. Malay mo katawa tawa pala kami haha!"

"Sira hahahaha. Kinaya niyo naman eh. Proud ako sa inyo." tinapik ko nalang yung balikat niya bago tuluyan nang umakyat papasok sa may kwarto ko. Iniwan ko na muna siyang nanonood at natulog na ako.

Kinabukasan.

I heard someone's talking to Blaster. Para ba silang nagkakaroon ng mini argument. Hindi ko alam kung sino dahil medyo unfamiliar yung boses and I think it's crying to Blaster. "Matagal na yon, Crys. Ayoko na." Nang makita ko na sila nang tuluyan, yumakap si Crys kay Ter at para bang nagmamakaawa-- "Please Ter, come back to me please!"  but she failed because Blaster didn't hugged him back. I walked through the kitchen like 'hayaan mo silang mag usap' pero lumingon pa rin sila sakin. "Uhm- pardon?" I said then shrugged.

"Crystal. You can leave."

"Ter please--"

"I said LEAVE!"

After she left our apartment, Blaster sighed and started to cook. "Ako nalang dyan. I know you're stressed right now." kinuha ko yung sandok, luckily hindi na siya pumalag pa sakin. I prepared our breakfast at magkaharap na nakaupo sa may dining table namin. Nagsimula na siyang kumain. He acts normal na para bang wala siyang nasigawan kanina.

"Aren't you guilty?" tanong ko as he dropped down his spoon to drink a water. He didn't answer me so I asked him again, "Haven't you realize that you also feel the same like ate Crystal?" He shrugged and looked to me. "Same like what? Paano?" I looked around and said, "Both of you are trying to work our things like-- pleasing someone na hindi mapunta punta sa inyo."

Silence remained between us.

I tried to break the ice saying, "She's begging you to come back, while you are trying to pursue Unique to work it out kahit na malabong mangyari yon." Nagpatuloy nalang siya sa pagkain niya at nagsalita din, "Yes I feel guilty. Lagi naman ako naguguilty eh. I know I shouldn't have done to Crystal Faith, but atleast she knew what exactly my point is. I don't wanna let myself play with her emotions again.." I think he's done eating kaya tumayo na siya while me busy na naman mamaya, umakyat na ako para asikasuhin mga paperworks ko.

♠️♠️♠️♠️

Hindi ko na ulit nakita si Blaster ngayong araw na to. Hays. Saan na naman kayang lupalok nagsusuot at sumiksik yon? Isn't he meeting up with Uneknok again? Eh napaka imposible naman na kausapin ulit siya nun. Baka naman naggala o nagpapalamig lang ang aking handsome brother? Let him be free, malaki na din naman siya hahahaha.

Pumunta muna ako sa may Infinitea para bumili nggg-- MILKTEA!

"Gusto mo-- oh I guess magpapalibre ka na naman argh." nakakainis din minsan tong si Gelo eh. Sakto lagi yung dating niya pag nabili ako ng Milktea hahaha! Amoy niya ata yung Milktea maski sa bahay nila e! "Kaya ako nataba alok ka ng alok dyan eh." reklamo niya. Natawa ako ng matipid at hinampas siya ng mahina sa braso niya. "Baliw!" ngumiti siya sakin at dumugtong siya ng, "Baliw sayo ayiee agugugu!"

Of course. He never fail to make me smile and blush everytime we see each other.

Umupo muna kami at kumain. Bumili siya ng dalawang box ng pizza dahil alam niyang favorite ko talaga yon lols. "Hanggang dito ba naman dala mo pa rin laptop mo?" tanong niya habang nagtatype ako ng captions sa mga picture na nakuha ko. "Rush namin na project to eh." tiniklop ko muna yung laptop ko at inabutan niya ako ng isang slice ng pizza. "Thanks." I smiled to him. "Grabe. Alam mo, never ko inexpect na itutuloy at magugustuhan ko nang sobra itong photography. I told you guys before na napilitan lang naman ako dahil sa step mother ko." sabay higop ng Milktea.

"Hmm. You know Blaire, maybe it's just destined na mangyari lahat nang to. Maybe God used your step mom to be an instrument na mapursue yung talent mo through taking photos." he paused and I looked at him suspiciously like I'm asking what do you mean? "Kung hindi ka naging photograppher or naging frustrated singer before, hindi ka makikilala ni Blaster. Hindi siya magiging interesado sayo. All of your life inisip mong malas ka, but for me? For us? You're truly a miracle dahil nahanap ni Blaster yung matagal na niyang hinahanap, ikaw yung kapatid niya. You met IV OF SPADES and of course.." he paused and held my hands.

"Naging connected tayo, as I met the ONE and it's you."

I feel like time stopped between us. "Wao. Smooth." inirapan ko lang siya (para kunwari hindi easy to get girls ano ba! Konting kipot lang hahahaha) "Lagi naman akong seryoso sayo, Blaire Gabriel Silonga." I feel like my eyes are starting to heat up. Naiiyak ako sa mga sinabi niya sakin, I'm so touched!

"Thank you for existing, Angelo Esperon."

"I love you."

"I love you more."