darling | brendon urie | sequel to "strawberries"

33: "i love you too dad"

tw sh

"hey...are you...busy?" i asked my dad.
"nope" he put his laptop down on the coffee table. "whats up?" he gestured me to sit down next to him.
"i had a nightmare. a-about some stuff that happened in the past" i sat down. "it just got me thinking about a lot of stuff"
"you wanna share?" he asked.

"my mom was so young when she had me" i whispered. "a-and to think she just hurt me with whatever time i had with her a-and finding her dead..." tears filled my eyes. "im sorry i-im just saying random stuff" i sniffled.
"no! continue, this is good" he slid his hand into mine and squeezed. i felt a bit calmer.
"them my dad...he turned out to be a total dick. and its so shitty because i have to have nightmares about all this...like im happy that im safe and i live with you again. but i just wanna tell my mom im sorry and forget about everything else" i sighed. i started to cry. god im such a cry baby. "sorry this is stupid" i sniffled.

"no it's not" he gave me a hug and wiped my tears gently. "im really proud of you for coming to talk to me. i know how hard it is for you and you did it" he kissed my head gently.
"i just wish i could go back time and be clean again. i was for so long. now i..." i paused. brendon lifted up my sleeve to the jagged scars on my wrist.
"no darling you can't do this to yourself" he held me close. "we're gonna talk to molly about this. we'll find you a new hobby too. okay?" i nodded. "i love you so much darling"

"i love you too dad"
he looked at me astonished, tears in his eyes. but he hugged me longer, not even thinking of letting me go.