It's Never Just Goodbye // Ed Sheeran

Over The Phone

Ed

You're like a junk email in my inbox

Keep coming back, you keep coming back - Nina Nesbitt

I left shortly afterwards. Grabbing my hoodie and hurrying out the door. Walking fast in the cold to try to make sense of things. If Taylor thought that was a dick move, I thought, obviously it was.

It was like the hours before were repeated. I took the stairs up, paced my room, and made myself a drink. A drink I didn't need. I was already pretty buzzed.

All right. All right. I tried to sort out my possibilities. Come to sense of what the hell happened tonight and how I felt.

Alice called me. Okay. And I told her never to call back. The words were calm, but I had to have been off the wall. Maybe it was the beer that calmed me down.

I took another sip of the wine cooler.

As I closed my eyes, I predicted all I would see was Alice. Her dark green eyes staring back at me. But, instead, I saw Nina. Her pools of brown, rich like coffee.

It was weird. After years of only thinking about myself or Alice...That's not how it was anymore. Other things held their place in my mind. Nina, for one. I was wired on the fact that I hurt her.

I had to call her.

Grabbing another bottle, I fell onto the bed and put my feet up. The phone laid in my hand, but I couldn't push myself to do it. It was cowardly, I knew that, but the hardest thing was finding the right words for the perfect apology.

After drinking half the wine cooler, my hands shook even faster. Drops of sweat formed on my forehead. Nervously, my leg bounced up and down and my hands shook. In seconds, I knew I couldn't stand sitting anymore. I was up and on my feet pacing the hotel room.

My stomach felt sick. I had drank too much again. Then the thought hit me, I wondered if I sounded drunk. She's not going to want her drun boyfriend to call and apoligize for being drunk.

I decided to call someone else first. Maybe Taylor - but she was pissed, too. She took Nina's side, but I got why. I would have too.

I called my brother. "Hey, Matt." I said normally.

"Hey. Haven't heard from you in a while. It's been forever. Mum and dad miss you."

He was right. I hadn't talked to him in months.

"Really?"

"That's all they ever talk about." Then, he chuckled. I could hear the smile in his voice. "And how proud they are of you."

I smiled, "That's awesome, man. How've you been?"

"Great. Just great. How about you?"

"Eh, I'm okay. Tired, I guess. Jet lag could kill ya."

He laughed like he understood, "I gotcha."

"I have a question..."

"Yeah?"

"Does it seem like I've been drinking?"

My brother laughed, again. A hearty, loud one. "Why? You gonna' call mum next? Dude, she doesn't give a shit."

"No... I'm just wondering if, like, you could tell I've been drinking."

"Well, I can't see you." He joked. He was screwing with me.

"Matt, come on. Be serious."

"You call me for the first time in months to ask me if it sounds like you've been drinking." He states. And I could tell he was shaking his head, still laughing. "How can I be serious?"