It's been a fews days since the start of training and I'm telling you, I am really really tired now. My hands gone all red because of the balls that I hit continuously. As far as I can see, the team is doing great, team work always works on us so it'll no problem when the game comes. The game will be held in our school so at those days of plays, regular classes will be canceled.
Also, I'm not going at the house anymore, I can't see that witch, it will just spoil my mood to play good in upcoming game. I couldn't afford to lose just because of that witch. So I stayed in my penthouse, there it will give me at least a bit of peace.
Ina and I are not having any bit of conversation either and it makes me upset. I know I should cancel and delete this feeling, if it is just easy, I would do it but I can't. Not when I see her everyday and every minute of the practice wearing spandex triggering my hormones.
It's currently our water break and everyone is too exhausted to stand so we're all sitting on the bleachers. I watch her talk something to coach holding the folder that shows our records and improvements. From time to time I can see Coach Smith nodding and he walks towards us indicating they're done talking. He started explaining what's needed to be done and change to my teammates while I just sit here, watching how her facial expression changes again. She has been more kind of sensitive? Is that the right word? Whatever, she has changed, she has always been sweet but now she looks problematic. I want to ask what's wrong, I could die of curiosity and worry but I'm afraid she's tell me to fck off like a stupid person has approached her again.
Shrugging my worries for now, we started the practice again with drills and such training to improve their skills.
Heading to the shower room late because I had took a call from my dad saying to go home now and that I was never 'home' these past few days. I didn't speak though, I hang up immediately rolling my eyes. It's not home. It's just a pure after war place. A mess.
I arrived at the shower room and no one was inside already, all stalls are vacant, well I assume since no one is making a noise, not a shower or running water. They must've gone home all already, anyway it's 5:30 pm.
Turning the shower into a warm water, I let it drop down to my body as I felt my nerves giving in into the sensations. I let out a moan feeling relaxed.
After I finish showering and wear a comfortable sweatpants and a comfortable shirt, I headed to the parking lot which I spotted her again, troubled at the faculty's parking lot. She was leaning at her door staring at nowhere.
I sigh and walk to her direction without her even noticing me.
"Hey, what's wrong? You look lost?"- My tone sounded worried and I couldn't take it back.
She snapped and then look at me shaking her head and sigh.
"You should go home, it's late already. Everyone has gone home"-She shrugged my question and proceeded to open her door but I slammed it shut.
"Let's talk"- I said and dragged her to my car, she resisted and keep resisting until I open the passenger's seat for her and slam it after showing my annoyance not to her but to the situation. But of course she doesn't know that.
"What's wrong with you!?"-She practically yelled at me as I sat on the driver's seat beside her.
"I'm just worried okay!? You look so lost these past few days and I can't keep my team having that troubled assistant coach"-I retorted and crossed my arm.
"Well just to inform you Ms. Davis, it is non of your business!"-She yelled again showing me her frustration.
"Well sorry Ms. Taylor but IT IS my business when you can't focus well on my team!"-well that's a lie since she has separated her troubled business with our training, she didn't mix her personal problems with our training but I can't find a good reason to justify why I want to know what's troubling her.
"I was well focused and I can keep my personal business separate Ms. Davis"- she clenched her jaws showing she's now irritated of me.
"Just what on earth is bothering you?"-I sigh and stated in softer tone. Yelling at her won't give me answers
She look away, refusing to answer.
"Please? Just let me know—-"
"It is non of your business okay? Even if I will tell you, what an unexperienced kid like you can do? Cry?"-Okay that is so rude of her.
"So that's it. I'm just a kid, well thank you I feel great and you feel greater by calling me that?"
"Very well said."-Okay a real bitch.
I stared at her waiting if she is going to give me answers despite of degrading my adultness. She showed no sign though.
"You're not exiting my car unless you tell me so."I said monotonously, no yelling, not soft tone neither.
"It's between me and MY boyfriend okay. He really needs me right now and I don't know what on earth am I going to do to make him feel less lonely."-she sigh and her words confused me, like why lonely exactly?
"Well, I think YOUR boyfriend is more likely a kid than me to feel lonely Miss. If you want advice, let him fvck you, trust me he will be in euphoria"-I rolled my eyes at the childishness of the guy.
Like why will a guy tell his girlfriend he's lonely unless he wants a fvck.
But in a second, I just feel a sudden heat on my cheeks and feel it stinging after a few seconds. She slap me.
"Well for your information Davis, he loss his grandparents in a car accident few days ago. It was childish to hear such words coming from your mouth. What should I expect? You're young and inexperienced, you have lots of things intact in your life. You don't know what a real loss is."-'twas all she said and I heard my car door slammed bringing a loud impact inside. I couldn't move, her words are too much to absorbed.
The last sentence keep attacking my mind.
'You don't know what a real loss is'
It is that moment that I started to have it again.
Panic attack.
I couldn't move, it was like someone poured me the lowest negative degree Celsius of water. My heart starts to chase an unknown beat as if it needs to leave my rib cage and my breath seems to leave me already, my brain couldn't think or process anything even if I want to. I want to do something, reach for any medicine but I couldn't, I've experienced this many times before but I'm still not used to it, I still don't know what to do, I'm dizzy, I don't know, I'm confused. I'm cold and then suddenly I feel hot and started sweating. I know I'm going to pass out so I reach for my door and open it stumbling as I land on the ground of the parking lot.
YOU ARE READING
Hide & Seek
Romance"Sorry I always run away, it was my best way to escape the pain, because no one taught me how to face it." Will love be enough to make someone safe and stay? Is love reason to work things out?
