TOUR [ H.S ]

49. Los Angeles,Night One(Part one).

Katie:

2 weeks were finally came to an end and i was now in Los Angeles,i felt like everything has happened so fast.

Gemma and Anne really took care of me when i stayed with them,my heart felt extremely heavy knowing that the father of my child wasn't with me but nonetheless i was grateful that i had Anne and Gemma with me through it all.

However,Harry had tried calling me almost everyday to ask how i've been doing which was odd because he was the one that decided to send me back home.A part of me felt worried because he couldn't stop asking questions about me and sometimes about how i felt now that i'm pregnant,i thought he didn't want anything to do with this pregnancy?

The whole crew found out about it as well and we all promised each other not to tell or spread the news, but we still haven't figured out how to keep this secret from the fans or the public eye.What matters is that only the important people knew about this and thats all,slow and steady.

In 2 days time,tour will be over.

I couldn't believe this..it felt like just yesterday i had just started working here.I haven't even seen Harry yet,i didn't even know why i was feeling so nervous to see him again.Our last conversation in real life did not end well so i hope that these upcoming two days will be a little more easy going.

Jeff has planned a surprise party for Harry and the band at the Grove after his last show is done,he booked a Japanese themed bar somewhere in LA.I just don't want to ruin Harry's special day because i know how hard he has worked throughout these past few months and he deserved it.In fact I'm still thinking if i should even go,i wanted him to be happy.

I grabbed my bottle of water from the wooden table and walked towards the dressing room,i had to face him this time.I slowly opened the door but before i could even enter the room,i heard sniffing noises.I furrowed my eyebrows with confusion as i tried to focus on who were making those noises,it was like as if someone was crying softly.

"fucking hell come on,you're going to go out there with or without her.You got this." i immediately recognised the voice,it was Harry's.He was talking to himself and he sounded like he was crying.

I heard him sniffle once again and then i walked in the room swiftly,really taking a good look at his state.He looked so worn out,he had clearly lost a lot of weight,his cheeks were so sunken in,his dark circles were even more noticeable,almost like he hasn't been sleeping well.
"Harry?" I called and he looked at me,his eyes still filled with tears and his hands were shaking.

My heart was breaking right now,i had never seen him in such a state.Something wasn't right and i am feeling worried.

"Y-you came back." whispered Harry and i nodded slowly,he looked so unhealthy.

"You said two weeks..so here i am." I said softly and he immediately ran towards me and hugged me tightly.

i know that you're expecting me to push him away or scream at him but i didn't..i couldn't.I just hugged him back,it was the first thing i thought of and it felt right.

"I fucked up,i-i really did." He attempted to speak but i shushed him, "Harry,listen to me.You need to eat something light and then you're going to go out on that stage and do what you love.We can talk about everything later once we're done but in the mean time,i'm going to be standing at the side of the stage and i'll be watching you." I told him as i caressed the side of his face and he slowly nodded with tears still in his eyes,i couldn't kiss him or say i love you back at this moment because i needed to understand what was going through his head and why he was in such a bad state.

"Dance your heart out to Only Angel for me." I added and he gave me a small smile,nodding his head.

He still looked despaired and it broke my heart to see him like this,i couldn't let him go on stage looking like that.

Just as he was about to walk out of the door,i grabbed his wrist,causing him to turn around to glance at me.

"Remember how excited you were knowing that you were going to perform at the forum? You told me that when we were just friends.This is your first solo tour and you're finally here,one step away from the final show." I said as i walked closer to him and i gently wiped away his tears with my fingers,his gaze fixed on me.

"I want to see you go up on that stage with a smile plastered on your face,whether it be fake or not.This has always been your dream and i wan't to see you live it.You understand me Harry?" I asked him and he still had such a sad look in his eyes.

I grabbed both his hands and held it in mine,slowly rubbing the back of his hands to soothe him.
"Promise me you'll live your dream out there ?" I asked him,making deep eye contact with him.

"I..promise." he replied and then he walked out of the room.

Showtime.

[two minutes before showtime]

"You talked to him about everything yet love ?" Asked Lou as we both walked towards the side of the stage, "I told him that we'll talk about it later." I answered and she frowned at my response.

Of course,no one would understand.

"What! Why?"Questioned Lou,handing me a bottle of water as the both of us patiently waited for Harry to come out on stage, "Because performing on his own at the forum has always been a big dream of his,i know how much this means to him.A-and i don't think i can bare watching him if he doesn't have a smile on his face tonight,he needs to live his dream tonight.I don't want to ruin anything for him." I said as i tried to hold back my tears and Lou leaned her head on my shoulder as she rubbed my lower back. 

"You know how you always say that Harry was too good to be in this world?" reminded Lou and i looked at her confusedly,humming in response.

"The truth is,you're too good to be in this world."