You're Not Alone

Chapter 9

Lexa's POV

It was our third day here. We woke up, got breakfast and went out to play basketball for a bit. Clarke was getting better day by day at playing. A bus stopped at the parking lot as we were playing. Few students got off and walked towards the second building that was right next to ours with suitcases. I didn't care and I continued to play but then I saw the teachers shirt. Polis High. I was frozen, I couldn't move or say anything. I just stood there lost in my own thoughts. Ball hit the back of my head and that's when I stopped daydreaming. Clarke ran to me and grabbed my face.
„Lexa are you okay?!" She frowned at Bellamy.
„Yeah Im fine." I said scratching the back of my head and pushing her hands away not taking eyes off of the students.
„What's wrong?" She asked looking at me.
„Polis High." I pointed at the teachers shirt.
„Pray that Costia's not here." I told her.
Like hell she wasn't. I spotted shorter blond girl in the crowd. My body was frozen. I couldn't move that's how nervous I was.
„Guys what's wrong?" Lincoln asked when he saw my worried face.
„Polis High. Costia's here." The worry in my eyes made Clarke more worried than I was.
„Where is that bitch?" Raven walked up to us rolling up her sleeves and Octavia clenching her fists.
Costia saw me and friendly waved at me as she approached me. I wanted to walk up to her when I felt Clarke pulling me back.
„You don't have to go."
„This is something I have to deal with on my own." I gave her reassuring smile even tho I was nervous.
I walked towards Costia and looked at her with emotionless face.
„Hi Lexa! I didn't expect you to be here." She said as she put my hands on my neck hugging me.
„You're not the only one." I said annoyed pushing her away gently.
„What's up? We haven't talked for a while." She was smiling like we were best friends.
„Oh nothing much. What about you?" I asked ready to strike back.
„Fake rumours are spreading around the school and my fake friends aren't here for me to solve it. My parents are on bussines travels. Not like I would tell them but I have no one to talk to." She said like wanted me to feel bad for not being there for her.
„Payback's a bitch, isn't it?" I smirked and walked away.
She stood there with her jaw on the floor as I approached the rest of my friends. Teacher called her and she walked away with her suitcase with anger.
„Well...I didn't expect that." Raven said with slightly surprised face.
„Are you fine? Did she hurt you?" Clarke started to examine my face.
„Clarke I was right there. If something happened you would see it." I said pushing her arms away and holding onto her hand. I smiled and so did she.
„Are they going to be here for the rest of the week with us?" Lincoln asked.
„Whatever. We are here to protect you at all costs Commander." Octavia put her hand on her chest and bowed in front of me. We laughed and walked inside.
„Do we get to meet her?" Bellamy asked.
„Be glad you don't know her yet." I said as I put my hand on his shoulder.
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Clarke's POV

The day went by we got our lunch and then we talked for a while in lunch hall until it was evening.
We walked inside our room and I sat on the bed with Lexa. She looked at me with worry in her eyes or like if she was hurt.
„Lexa what's wrong?" She really tried to put on her emotionless face but it didn't work this time.
„You don't have to tell me if it's about Costia but.."
„No it's not that." She cut me off and I could feel the sadness in her voice.
„I just...I would really like to talk about that kiss. I mean what was that for?" She asked a bit confused but she definitely didn't regret that. I was shook at first but I answerd after a while. To be honest I had to think about it too.
„Well you kissed me first to be exact." I teased.
„Clarke. Im being serious."
„I don't know Lexa. When Im with you I feel like I've never felt around anyone. Not even Bellamy." These words escaped my mouth. I realized that Lexa doesn't know.
„Bellamy? What do you mean?" She tilted her head with confusion.
„Bellamy and I were a thing but we broke up a year ago. Im sorry I forgot to tell you."
„Oh. Im sorry about that." She gave me 'im sure you haven't moved on yet' look.
„Thanks for telling me. If you ever need to talk-"
„Lexa Im over it." It was a year ago and I think that our relationship didn't even mean anything really back then.
„Yeah. Right. Im tired. Good night." She laid down and turned her back to me. I knew she was faking it.
„Good night" The sadness and confusion was taking over me. I really wanted to know what's up. Maybe it's just because of Costia or maybe because of that kiss. I really didn't know.
I laid down but I couldn't sleep. I didn't want to see her hurt. And I knew that I felt something unknown for me towards her, but I just didn't want to admit it. After all I fall asleep.
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I woke up without Lexa in bed. I reached for her with my hand but it was empty. I shot up and looked around if I can find her somehwere. She wasn't there.
I rubbed my eyes and heard door open.
„Morning. I didn't want to wake you up."
„Where were you anyway?" I asked a bit angry at her for not telling me.
„Morning run." I could tell. She looked hot when she was sweaty. I stood up and walked over to her.
„Im going to take a shower." She closed the door before I was even able to say something. I stood there in shock waiting for her to walk out. We really need to talk.
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I was sitting on the bed and waited for Lexa. After a while she opened the door and walked out, wearing light blue oversized shirt and black jeans. I stood up and stopped her before she could walk out of the room.
„Lexa we need to talk."
„What is it?" She asked worried.
„I should be the one asking you that. Why are you acting like that? What happened?" I asked taking her hand in mine.
She looked down at our hands and then back up.
„Im fine."
„Stop lying I know you're not."
„I really am."
„You always try to act like you are fine like nothing ever happens to you but I'll tell you one thing." She took a few steps back after hitting the table behind her but I followed.
„I can see right through you." I pushed her against the table and looked at her with frown but worried expression at the same time. She looked down at me with mouth slightly open.
She kissed me. I didn't kiss back at first from the shock but then I did. She cupped my cheek and pulled me back as I put my arms around her neck. I deepened the kiss and kissed her more passionately.
I realized what I was doing I pulled back and stepped back.
She looked at me with hurt in her eyes and confusion.
„Clarke-"
„Sorry, Im not ready." I said without looking at her.
„I-"
„I said Im not ready okay?! I think you should go." It hurted like hell. I didn't want her to go.
„What?" She whispered. I could hear the pain in her voice.
„Just go." I turned around. I couldn't look at her or I would immediately regret it.
„You said you're not ready. Why didn't you pushed me away?! Why did you kiss me deeper?! If you would tell me I wouldn't do anything! I was stupid to trust you." With that she walked away, door closing behind her louder than ever. I stood there shocked I was speechless. I broke down crying. She was hurt and I hurted her even more. I wanted to run after her but I couldn't. I regret everything. I really cared about her.
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We sat down in lunch hall waiting for breakfast. Lexa wasn't there obviously. I had no idea where she was or when she will come back.
„Where's Lexa?" Octavia asked.
„I don't know. Maybe she went for a run?" I said not wanting to tell them the truth. Of course O and Raven didn't believe me but they looked at me like 'you'll tell us later'.
„Well I hope she'll be here after breakfast. We have a match to win." Bellamy said as he highfived with Lincoln. No matter how hard they tried, Lexa could always easily take them down.
„I hope so too." I said and Raven gave me reassuring smile.
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We finished our breakfast and went outside to do something. I was distracted by looking for Lexa and everyone noticed. Bellamy and Lincoln didn't feel like playing without Lexa so we just went for a walk. It was me, Bell, Lincoln, O, Rae and surprisingly Murphy joined us.
„Jaha has something planned tonight."
„Probably another of his stupid bonfires." Murphy was obviously annoyed by everything here.
„Why did you even go Murphy?" Raven said annoyed by him at this point.
„Better than be stuck in Arkadia."
„Yeah right cockroach always does what's best for him." Murphy rolled his eyes at Raven's sentence.
„Do you have any idea what it could be except Murphy?" Bellamy asked trying to keep peace.
„We have bonfire every night. If he wants it to be something 'special' he wouldn't do bonfire." Lincoln had a point. I didn't care really. I wasn't even listening much, I was lost in my own thoughts wondering where Lexa could be.
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Lexa's POV