Faded Wings [Birdtale Sans x Reader]

Chapter 13- Calm Down

You closed the dreaded door behind you and stood in the barely lit hall. You glanced at the small clock that was resting on the pale white wall, 4:30. It was hours before you had to make breakfast and go to school. However, you knew you wouldn't get much sleep due to your constant nightmares. You groaned silently as you strolled into the living room. 

It reeked of alcohol and anger, empty beer bottles and caps littered the floor. Your back seared with pain as you bent down to clean up the mess. However, you didn't wince nor whine. After doing this on repeat for years, you begin to get used to it. Your mind, on the other hand, now that was a different story. You quietly picked up the bottles and caps, throwing them in the recycle. You scanned the floor making sure there was no more. There could be no evidence of being different. There could be no evidence that something was wrong. There could be no evidence that you were being beaten.

No evidence at all.

After finding nothing, you sat on the worn-out brown sofa. You didn't lean back or relax into the comfiness of the cushions. Instead, your feet were planted and you were ready to spring up if needed. It was so quiet in the house, you could hear the ticking of the clock. Tick. The sounds of curses and insults. Tock. The feeling of being slashed in the back and wings. Tick. The taste of leather as you bit into a belt, muffling your screams. Tock. The smell of cheap alcohol. Tick. The sight of crimson red blood and a scary shadow. The deafening silence was slowly killing inside as you stared at the dreaded door. It was getting hard to breathe as memories swirled in your head. It was as if there was someone wrapping their cold, long fingers around your neck, suffocating you.

You needed to get out. 

Without another word, you rushed out the door outside. Your feet slammed onto the cracked sidewalk as the world around you blurred. You were running. To the few people out, it seemed like it was from nothing. To them you were just your everyday citizen, working out or something. However, you weren't. You were running from everything. The silence, the pain, the memories, the dreaded door, the scary shadow, everything. Your heart was racing and your mind was spinning as you tried to calm down. This was going to take a while.

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Sans Pov

I was out on a morning walk, which was pretty strange for me. However, it felt a bit nice and helped cool down my nerves. Not too long ago, I woke up from a nightmare of one of the many genocides. It was the very first one ever. I was on my way to check on my business in waterfall when I saw something in the snow. I treaded closer only to find Pap's orange cap in a pile of dust. I still remember the way I cried and wailed for Papyrus. I shook the memory off and kept moving forward. I have no reason to dwell on it, I thought as I looked ahead. Frisk destroyed the reset button so it's never going to happen again, I reassured myself.

After reaching the surface, I knew it wasn't going to last. I just waited and waited until we ended up back in the underground. It would only take time until the kid got bored. So, I stayed inside and didn't live life, hating the kid every single moment. When one day the kid walked up to me and began to talk to me in private. I was, of course, pissed at them as they tried to pretend that they weren't going to reset again, that this was the final run. I called bullshit!! Well, that was until they brought up the button and smashed it into pieces. At that moment I was shocked, so shocked that I thought I jumped back into my skin. It was gone, it was really gone. After that, I let up on the kid and began to live life. I went outside, socialized, enrolled in a school, and here we are now. 

It was beautiful outside. The sky was yellow and orange on the bottom as it blended up into a blue. The clouds were pinkish and fanned out as if they were butterflies flying in the wind. There was a nice brisk autumn breeze with colorful leaves dancing inside. It was great. I smiled as I strolled down the sidewalk, it was peaceful. When I began to hear heavy footsteps behind me. I turned to see [Y/N] running, quite quickly. I was thinking about waving towards her when I noticed the look on her face.  Her eyes seemed distant as if she wasn't really there. I watched as she ran past me and down the street. Where was she going, I wondered. However, I had a bigger question as she faded from my point of view.

Was she okay?

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[Y/N] Pov

After a while, you neared your house again.  You were somewhat calm now.

Somewhat.

You knew you could never be completely calm. As long as the shadow moved, you always had to watch your back. Not to mention your life out in public, oh god. Everyone would stare at you with their judging or disgusted eyes. While they leaned to their friend or significant other and gossiped about you. Whether it was the truth or a lie, it didn't matter. It was always bad. Nonetheless, you lived life with a smile and kept moving. Cause if you didn't you would completely break down and lose all of your calm. 

You stepped inside your house and got to work on making breakfast. Only after you woke up Skyla so, she could get ready for school. Let's get the day started.