Ace - Book 1

Chapter 07.

**edited 13/01/2021**

Elle's POV

Sunday 23rd September 2018

        I was sat on my bed preparing to call Carson after not speaking for nearly a whole week - every text I sent when unread, every call went unanswered and every voicemail went ignored. I was pretty sure he wasn't going to answer but I finally had some time alone in the dorm and I assumed it'd be a pretty serious call and so I just needed to try. I unlocked my phone and pressed on his contact, clicking on the call button.

 I listened as the phone rang on and on, I thought he was just going to decline it like every other one but instead the call was answered and I heard his voice. "Hey Elle, is everything okay?" He seemed calm and casual like he hadn't been ignoring me for a whole week.

 "Is everything okay? Are you kidding me?" I sighed and sat back in my bed, preparing for a tough talk. 

 "What d'ya mean? What's the matter?" He asked with what seemed to be an annoyed voice. "Look Elle I'm busy, can we-"

 "No! No we can't talk later because you said that last Monday and you never answered, called or texted me back. I've been a sitting duck all week, I've got no idea what's happened but this isn't us," I said and he fell silent for a few moments.

 "I don't know what you want me to say, Elle. We knew it wouldn't be the same as when we were in high school, we're both super busy and right now we just need to try and get through the tough part, it'll get easier," he promised and I really wanted to believe him, I did.

 I shook my head. "Yes we're both busy but the difference is I made time for you, you didn't even give me a second thought for a whole freaking week Carson! If we're going to make this long distance thing work then we're going to need to at least try, you promised me you'd always be there if I needed you and this week that just hasn't been true."

 "I can't be there all the time, Elle."

 "I don't want all the time! I want a couple measly texts a day and maybe a five minute phone call every now and then to catch up. That shouldn't be a chore I'm begging you to do, it's not the damn dishes! Talking to your girlfriend shouldn't be this awful punishment that you dread, Car, you should want to do it," I sighed and looked down at the sleeve on my cardigan. I could feel the tears forming because this week had been so overwhelming and I just wanted my old Carson back to make something feel normal.

 "I don't know what you want me to say, Elle. I've been super busy," he said.

 "Too busy to text me? What have you been doing? You have maximum three classes a day, all evening you have free from work!" I tried to reason with him but nothing was working.

 "I have friends, Elle! I have people that I want to hang out with and see," he snapped.

 "You don't wanna see me?" I almost yelled back.

 "Maybe not if you're gonna be this fucking moody!" He spat and my heart dropped in my chest. "Stop being so fucking needy, Elle. It's not a good look on you."

 I fell silent for a few moments as tears began rolling down my cheeks. "I'm not being needy, I just miss you," I whimpered. I felt so pathetic as he was obviously pushing me away but I didn't want to let go, I loved him.

 "You're doing my head in recently," his voice was low and cold.

 "How could I do your head in when you haven't spoken to me? Do you have telepathic powers or something?" I snapped.

 "God you're such a fucking bitch sometimes!" He yelled and I froze.

 "Carson," I begged shamelessly.

 "Fuck. You know I didn't mean that baby," he whispered, his voice cracking.

 "I think you did mean that, Car. I don't think you want to admit that you did, but I think you meant it," I wiped my cheek and took a long breath in. "If I'm really that much of a bother then maybe you don't want me anymore."

 "Don't say that, Elle," Carson begged.

 "What else am I supposed to think when you just called me moody and needy!" I snapped, I was beginning to shake and my heart was pounding in my chest. 

 "Maybe we just need a little break, cool down and then we can talk about this later," he said and I nodded even though he couldn't see me. "I love you Elle, I didn't mean to shout and call you names."

 "I love you too, we'll talk later," I whispered before hanging up the phone.

 As soon as the phone hit the bed I curled up into a ball and began sobbing into my pillow, my whole body shaking. The way he spoke to me wasn't the Carson I knew - he'd never raise his voice and put me down like that, he'd never put me last and make everything else a priority before me. He'd never make me feel this worthless.

 I hugged my pillow to my chest and continued to hysterically cry into the pillow, not even bothering to hide it when the door to the dorm room opened. I assumed that Delilah had just gotten home. 

 "Elle? Oh my God Elle are you okay?" Delilah's worried voice came and then I had arms around my body. "What happened?"

 "He," I whimpered and hiccupped. "He shouted at me, he called me needy and a bitch. He said we need a break," I said before breaking into more tears.

 "Oh baby," she cooed and stroked my hair from behind me. "Okay give me two minutes, I'm going down to tell Kit I'm not going out. We're gonna have a girls night with chocolate, candy and shit loads of alcohol," she promised me and kissed my forehead over and over again.

 I nodded and whimpered a thank you to her, rolling over to watch her leave but instead I was met with Ace's towering body. I didn't feel like hearing his mockery or 'I told you so's' about Carson and so I just nestled my head into the pillow. "Are you okay, Elle?" Ace's voice was so vulnerable, like he had no idea what he was supposed to be doing.

 "Why do you care Ace? You think it's my fault for even being in a relationship," I hiccupped, hugging my pillow tighter.

 "None of this is your fault," he said in a voice that was barely above a whisper. I glanced up at him to see his hands were balled in fists to his side and he was looking at the door, presumably waiting for Delilah to come back. 

 "It is, I'm so fucking stupid," I whimpered, burying my head back into the cushion so I could start crying again. 

 I heard someone come into the room a few moments later. "Okay I have emergency candy and a bottle of wine," she told me. "You can go now Ace, Kit's waiting for you."

 "I need to talk to you, now," he snapped at Delilah who silently followed him out of the room, they closed the door behind them.

 I heard hushed voices and then Delilah scolding Ace but I had no idea what nasty things he was probably saying about me, and in that moment I honestly couldn't care less. I just wanted to cry and loathe in my own self-pity. In less than a few minutes later the door reopened and Delilah came back in, she sat me up on the bed and then perched herself next to me, flicking the TV on. I laid my head on her shoulder.

 "I have wine," she said hopefully, holding up the bottle of white wine.

 "Fuck it," I sighed and took it from her. I unscrewed the cap and tipped the bottle back, gulping down some of the sweet liquid.