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Love should be unconditional. It should be something that never lacks substance. An uplifting force. Yet sometimes it hurts us. In truth you can love someone too much. Such a scary thought isn't it? That the thing we crave most in life can also be something that suffocates us. Fran once told me that when Tommy walked into a room, it was as if she couldn't breath. It wasn't in the clique way of he took her breath away but in a way where it felt as if hands were tightly wrapped around her neck and she was fighting for air. She loved him anyway. There was one morning I walked into the kitchen after leaving Finn to sleep longer and I found Polly sipping tea. She had a huge smile plastered on her face when she noticed me. Our conversation started off as a warning. The hard truth of being with a Shelby man and then it turned into happy tears as Polly told me something I had already come to realize I was pregnant. I couldn't look at Finn for long periods of time now. Not without feeling pure rage and picturing that harlet so close to him. Her lips touched where mine did. Her hands traveled through him. Would he have stopped her if I didn't walk in.
"Jo you haven't said a word all night. How was Paris?" Ada pried gently running her thumb over my hand. "For holding up all right?"
"She met a man," I gave a half hearted smile. "Seems quite inthralled with him. Hope he doesn't go and do somthing stupid," the last of my words were sharp as I stole a look at Finn who recoiled into himself. His hand that had been resting on my thigh was now showed deep into the pockets of his suit jacket. He looked as pale as a ghost. As guilty as a convict.
"All men do stupid things," Ada chucked. "Right Finn?" Her teasing words were enough to cause Finn to vacate the Garrison leaving Ada and me alone I. The busy bar. Should I tell her. Should I keep this between Finn and I? "What stupid thing did my brother do?"
"He's a Shelby man Ada. He did what all Shelby men do." I place a hand on my tiny bump. "I did this to myself, didn't I? Maybe I should have listened to Edward, but no Josephine Jennings has never been the girl who listens."
"I'll kill him!" Ada stood up from her chair a rage consuming the small women. "And then I'll kill the rest of em because you and I both know Finn did not call that women into his office. The Finn Shelby I know wouldn't do that." I swallowed hard trying not to let myself cry.
"Ada what if he's changed his mind and I am not enough fir him?"
"Then he's a bloody fool because you're far more then he deserves Jo. Far more."
