"What happened?" Hindi ako makapaniwala sa narinig ko.
Habang nag-uusap kami, I didn't see any signs that there was something wrong.
Lise was smiling the whole time at mukha siyang happy.
"It happened months ago. After our visit to the doctor, the workup still wasn't definitive. I asked the gynecologist if there was any point to me doing the test. Sinabi niya na wala na talaga. At this stage daw, it would be better if we should look into other options. I will never forget the look of defeat in Dan's face. Para siyang pinagsakluban ng langit at lupa. I understand him dahil if there was one person who struggled, it was me. I was poked and prodded. With each examination, lalong bumababa ang tingin ko sa sarili ko dahil hindi ko maibigay ang gusto niya." Naluha si Lise.
Humugot siya ng tissue para punasan ang mata niya.
"I'm sorry." Yun lang ang nasabi ko.
Matagal na ang issue na 'to.
Noong kami pa, nabanggit niya ang kagustuhan ni Dan na magkaanak.
Ito ang laging topic nila kapag umuuwi ito para magbakasyon.
"That's not even the worse part." Tinapon niya ang tissue sa gilid ng kama.
"What is the worse part?"
"Pagdating namin sa bahay, nakaabang ang nanay niya. Ang laki ng ngiti sa mukha as if she was expecting us to tell her na nanalo kami ng jackpot sa lotto. I told Dan na dideretso na ako sa kuwarto dahil gusto ko ng magpahinga pero hindi pumayag ang nanay niya. Gusto niya daw marinig ang balita from both of us. I beg her and said na si Dan na lang ang bahalang makipag-usap sa kanya pero she yelled and said baog ako." Umiyak na naman siya.
Parang may punyal na tumarak sa dibdib ko ng marinig ang sinabi niya.
"That was it! Hindi ko na napigil ang sarili ko. Nasigawan ko ang nanay niya at sinabihan na tigilan niya na ako dahil I'm sick and tired of her constantly putting me down."
"Anong nangyari?"
"Dan got mad at me. Sinabihan ako na huwag ko daw sigawan ang nanay niya."
"What did you do after?"
"Sinabi ko na magsama silang dalawa. I've had it with her constant meddling and yung lagi niyang pamamahiya sakin dahil hindi ako mabuntis."
"Anong ginawa ni Dan?"
"Sinundan niya ko sa kuwarto. Pinagsabihan na hindi ko naman kailangang maging disrespectful sa nanay niya. Lalo akong nagalit. Sinabi ko sa kanya ang mga pagkakataon na his mother would shame me in front of their family. The sad part was, wala man lang siyang ginawa para ipagtanggol ako." Huminga siya ng malalim at tumitig sa akin sa screen.
"Nel, I don't want to live my life like this. Just because I'm barren doesn't mean I'm less of a woman. Hindi ko ginusto na hindi ako mabuntis-buntis. It wasn't meant to be and I have to accept that fact. Pero ang hindi ko ma-take ay yung lagi akong pinagmumukhang tanga or kawawa dahil sa tingin ng nanay niya, I'm inadequate or there's something wrong with me."
Tuloy-tuloy na siya sa pag-iyak.
Habang nakatingin ako sa kanya, it was one of those moments when I wish na sana, I was beside her. Gusto ko siyang yakapin at i-comfort.
But the only thing I could do was to listen and to tell her that I'm always there for her if she needs someone to talk to.
"I moved back with my mother." Sabi ni Lise.
"Anong sabi ng mama mo?"
"Mabuti naman daw at natauhan na ako." Tumawa siya.
Nasabi niya sa akin dati na wala namang problema ang parents niya kay Dan.
BINABASA MO ANG
6ix Days (Lesbian Story)
RomanceSix Days. That's all it took for the past to catch up with Chanel. But unlike her nineteen-year-old gullible self, she knew she had to turn her back on the past if she wanted a better future. Along came Maricar--a newcomer to Canada whose presence i...
